Page 96 of The Best of Us

Back in the kitchen, I dished it out, giving Colin more since he was a growing boy, then went upstairs with his meal. I hadn’t faced him since learning he’d been at Rebecca’s wake, and my heart raced at the mere thought of confronting him.

I paused outside his door, but from the sounds of it, he was on the phone.

“Having him here is all I ever wanted.” Those words nailed me to the floor and kept me from knocking.

So much for sticking to the plan and not telling Lennon who I am.

“I feel like I’m going to wake up, and it’s not real. That he’s not really here.”

My fingers curled into my palm at my side, and I stepped closer instead of offering him the privacy he deserved, hanging on to every word I knew he’d never say to my face.

“Mom likes to pretend she never wound up married after I was born because of me and nursing school and all that BS, but nah, it was her pushing all the guys away. It was because no one could live up to my father in her eyes. And after meeting him, I get that.”

I brought my fist to my chest where the agonizing pain pushed up into my throat, and my vision became blurry.

“But just because we want him in our life, doesn’t mean he’ll want us. It’s not like we’ll magically become one happy family, right?” He was quiet for a minute before continuing. “I have a dad. A total badass hero for a dad. And he has a criminal for a son.”

I blinked twice, and something wet slid down my face.

“I’m such a screwup, though. Why would he want me? And then what if he leaves, and it’s my fault, and I ruin Mom’s chance at happiness, too? She won’t survive that twice.”

His words sent me to my knees.

I set down his plate, hanging my head, and lost it. I fucking lost it.

I cried.

And prayed.

Begged God not to let me screw up.

To have mercy on me. To forgive me. Tosaveme.

Chapter29

Juliette

I can do this.I can go out there and act fine.“F. I. N. E.” I stared at my reflection in the bathroom mirror.I’m spelling out words, which is the exact opposite of fine.And I needed to sit before I fell over.

I went to the toilet, thankfully remembered to close the lid, and then sat just as Constantine called out, “You okay?”

Elbows digging into my legs, I rested my chin in one hand and slowly looked up at him. “Is my head still attached to my body because it no longer feels that way?”

“I can confirm that it’s thankfully attached.” His handsome smile was like a B6 shot, giving me new life. I even managed to sit upright and set my back against the wall.

The bathroom was also decorated with a beachy theme, which was apropos because while I knew we weren’t on a boat at sea, my head said otherwise. Maybe I was even swaying side to side. “The alcohol caught up with me. Can you tell?”

“Just a little bit.”

“This is part two of what drinking does to me.”

He folded his strong arms and leaned into the interior frame, studying me. “What’s part one?”

“You had a front-row seat not too long ago.” I winked, but it probably came across as me trying to blink a speck of dust free from my eye. Uber attractive.

His smile stretched. “Tell me anyway.”

“Mm.” I managed to wiggle three fingers in the air without toppling over. “The triple L’s.” I lowered one finger while noting, “Liquid truth serum.” Another finger. “Lust.” One more finger. “Lightheaded.”

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