Page 376 of From Rakes to Riches

“I would make sure you enjoyed it.”

His voice had deepened, roughened, losing some of the civilized, so-in-control sound. It did something to the inside of her, sent a strange, hot feeling shooting down into her stomach,down even lower, where it lingered with a heat that was almost…moist.

How could he make her feel this way?

Lord Thurlow put his glass down, and she gave a little start.

“But I don’t want you to be frightened when I touch you,” he said briskly, “so I have an idea of a way to introduce you to the intimacy of marriage.”

“Besides taking our time?”

He gave a small smile. “Besides that. Being that we don’t know each other as adults, and have not had much time for actual courtship, I propose that each night we go one step further in our intimacy.”

Was he trying to alter their bargain? “My lord, I don’t understand what you want of me.”

“I don’t want much, Victoria, but I’ll be grateful if you learn not to flinch when I touch you.”

“But I don’t?—”

“Yes, you do.”

She remained silent then, knowing he was right. He held out his hand, and she stared at it.

“Hold my hand, Victoria. I am a man, not some monster you need fear.”

She bit her lip. Was that how she made him feel? Inside her, something softened. Gingerly, she reached out and put her hand in his.

She had only once felt a man’s bare skin, when he’d kissed her hand several weeks ago. She’d been too flustered to think about anything but his lips. Now she realized that his flesh was warm and dry, rougher than hers across his palm. His hand was so much bigger than hers, making her feel fragile and small.

They sat unmoving before the hearth for several minutes, staring at each other. For the rest of her life, she would be with this man, and she must make the best of it. She must learn toforget her hurt feelings, to focus on the fact that his offer of marriage had saved her. He hadn’t needed to do it; it would have been nothing to him to offer her a little money.

Then he gave a tug and slowly pulled. She leaned forward from her chair; he leaned forward in his.

“A simple kiss,” he whispered, his breath now a warmth on her face, “on our wedding day.”

She should resist. He’d already kissed her cheek just that morning. And he’d promised not to rush intimacy. But as she looked into his eyes, so bright and almost fierce with purpose, her resistance began to melt, though she frantically called it back. He was more handsome than any man who’d ever looked her way, and such beauty could be mesmerizing.

Their lips met softly, and her wide eyes stared into his. She’d never been kissed before. And then it was over before she could think what to do. He leaned back, and the extent of her disappointment shocked her. Lord Thurlow released her hand and rose to his feet. She followed, and they faced each other awkwardly. He took his glass and bottle of wine and walked toward the door to his room.

“Good night, Victoria,” he said, without glancing back at her.

“Good night.” She stopped herself from calling him “my lord,” but could not bring herself to substitute his Christian name.

And then he was gone, and she was alone, not quite sure it was relief she was feeling. She sat down at her desk and opened her personal journal, because writing helped everything make sense.

David barely restrainedhimself from slamming the door. Nothing had gone as he’d meant it to. Whyever had he asked her to call him by his name, as if he somehow wanted to be close to her again?

Instead he’d allowed his virgin wife, who asked intimate questions of herhousekeeper, to question him about hismistress, for God’s sake. He had nothing to be ashamed of. He’d been more kind and understanding than most husbands would be on a wedding night.

But when she’d trusted him with her hand, full of a strength he hadn’t anticipated, something had happened inside him, something he didn’t understand.

And then he’d wanted to throw out all his plans, to sweep her onto the bed and take her immediately, as was his right.

What was he, a feudal knight? He didn’t think he’d ever skirted the edge of restraint like that. When she’d looked at him as if she might trust him again, it had almost been his undoing. He’d thought to satisfy himself with a chaste kiss, and even that had set his blood burning. Her lips were soft, silken…

He had to get control of himself, something he always prided himself on. There was never a business arrangement or an argument in the Commons of which he did not have complete mastery.

But his new wife, his childhood friend, had been afraid of him, and he’d only wanted to make that emotion go away.

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