Page 2 of Feels Like Coming Home

I pulled out of my garage and started towards the training center. Where the team trained was only fifteen minutes from my loft which was nice for early morning training days. This morning though, it didn’t feel like enough time. I wanted hours to sit and remember the dream I’d had about Haley and unpack every single part of it I still remember.

Her smile, the shape of her waist, how looking at her standing there turned me on. I shouldn’t be thinking about her this way—she’s married, for Christ’s sake. At least, she was the last time I stalked her on social media. It was almost eight years ago that I last did a deep dive into her life from the safety of my side of the internet. I could only see so much because, after our last night together, she’d unfriended me and went private with her account. But from what I could tell, she’d gotten married to the guy she started dating when we were in college. In the photos she was tagged in, she looked happy.

Actually, she looked breathtaking in the photo her mom posted of her wearing a long white dress and holding a big bouquet of flowers. But looking at her standing next to another man, married to him instead of me, made me feel like I wanted to throw up and put my fist through a wall all at the same time. She had decided to move on and be happy while I was still stuck in the past. How could I have been so stupid and treated her so poorly? Now she was married to another man.

It should’ve been me.

I was still thinking about how much I longed to be the one standing next to her at the altar saying “I do, forever and always,” when I pulled into my parking space. Without really paying attention, I made it to the training center by 5:30 even though training didn’t start until 6:00. I always preferred to be early so that I had time to myself in the quiet before things got crazy when the rest of the team showed up.

I grabbed my stuff from the backseat and headed inside to eat, change, and get to work. Today was the first day of training for the season and as the new guy, I knew I had a lot to prove. I wanted to be seen as a team player and someone who was focused on the game and nothing else.

If only Haley hadn’t decided to threaten that focus by visiting me in my dreams last night.

“Hey Camden,you looked great out there today!”

“Thanks, Coach. I'm excited to be here and be part of this team. I can’t wait for the season to start in a few weeks,” I replied, drying my hair since I’d just stepped out of the shower.

Coach Mike was a good guy and a huge reason why I was excited to play for this team now. He was known for being tough and demanding, but also fair and supportive. He expected a lot from all his players, but I would too if I was the head coach of a major NFL team where the players make millions of dollars a year. The other reason I liked him so much was because he reminded me a lot of my high school football coach, who was the first person to tell me that if I worked hard, I had the potential to go pro.

“How are you liking Charlotte so far? Have you explored the city at all?” Coach asked.

“Yeah, a little bit when I’ve had time. I spend most of my time here or training at the gym back at my place,” I explained.

“That’s all fine and dandy, but be sure to have a life too. Being married to the game isn’t all it’s cracked up to be. Forty years in and three failed marriages later, I can tell you that much,” Coach chuckled and waved a hand at me before walking toward his office.

“Are you going to remind him he’s on wife number four because he can’t keep it in his pants, or am I?” I heard a voice say behind me. I turned round to see my closest friend, Harvey, opening his locker and grabbing his things from inside.

“Look, I'm the new one here, YOU can be the one to say something. I need to stay on his good side,” I pointed a finger at Harvey and laughed.

Harvey and I had been friends since we played ball together in college. We met the first week of classes and became close when we realized we both had the same goal in mind.

Make it to the NFL.

We were both drafted after our senior year and have played for different teams over the years. He came to play in Charlotte two years ago and I was stoked when I got traded to the team because I knew it meant playing with Harvey again.

Still laughing, Harvey looked at me and spoke, “For real though, man, how do you like Charlotte so far? How’s the humidity treating you?”

“You forget I grew up in Pennsylvania, where the humidity rolls in by May and doesn’t leave until after Thanksgiving,” I replied as I threw my bag over my shoulder, fully dressed now.

“Ahh, that’s right. Little farmer boy from the middle of nowhere who made it big playing football,” Harvey teased as we walked out of the locker room.

“Harvey, please. I grew up in the furthest thing from a farm town. The kids at my school drove cars that cost more than the down payment on a house and wore shoes that cost three hundred dollars apiece. It definitely wasn’t a farm town, and Idefinitelywasn’t a farmer,” I reminded him for the hundredth time.

This has been something Harvey and I had discussed at least every week in college. As someone who originated from SoCal, he couldn’t believe that the entire state of Pennsylvania wasn’t just a giant cornfield.

Only about 80% of it was, really.

Harvey put his hands up. “I know, I know, I'm just giving you a hard time man. I'm happy you’re here,” he said, clapping a hand on my shoulder.

“I'm happy I'm here too. It’s a fresh start in a new place. I'm ready to get through training and the preseason so we can get to playing actual games.”

“Yeah, I'm excited about that too,” he replied as we reached our cars. “But right now, I'm more excited to get through afternoon conditioning so I can go home for the day. Monica is cooking dinner tonight and she’s making her homemade meatloaf. Damn, do I love that woman’s meatloaf. I would eat the entire thing if she’d let me. Or if the kids would let me.” He shook his head and smiled to himself.

Harvey met the love of his life in college and married her immediately after signing his first major contract. Within the first year of their marriage, they had a daughter, and then a son after that. I always admired Harvey for his commitment to Monica and his kids, even when his travel schedule and football career kept him away from home a lot. He would pay to have them travel where he played as much as they wanted and was always home when he wasn’t on the field. I secretly dreamed of having that for myself if I ever found the right girl.

You already found the right girl. You were just dumb as hell and never did anything about it.

“Awww, wittle Harvey wants his wittle meatwoaf?” I jabbed at him, even though I was only being a dick to cover up my jealousy.

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