Page 33 of Beckon

“I promise, it’s not what you think—”

“Yeah,” his friend cut in. “It’s not what you think.” She watched their exchange as best she could without endangering them. And if her heart didn’t hurt, it would’ve been slightly… more than slightly, funny.

“Whatdoesshe think, Sarge?”

Chandler never took his eyes off of hers in the rearview as he leaned in and spoke to his friend.

“Well, she thinks I lied about the meeting and went to get drunk with your stupid ass, if I had to take a guess. But between you and me, I’d never blow her off for you or to go drink. I like her too much for that.”

Tami’s heart pounded furiously in her chest. How is it that those few words practically erased her anger?

“Damn, I wouldn’t either, Sarge. You’re one lucky SOB.” He sat silent for the rest of the trip. When they pulled up outside the address he’d given her, he turned to Chandler. The connection between them was obvious.

“Thanks for coming to a meeting tonight, and thanks for saying what you did. I think she’s good for you.” He opened his door and swung his legs out seeming a lot more sober than he had previously. “For the record, he only had one beer and when he told me about you, I saw a look in his eyes I thought was gone forever.”

With those parting words, his friend was gone, and they were left in the car alone. Tami felt bad for making assumptions. “Do you want to sit up here?”

Chandler nodded and got out of the car. He helped her put all the stuff from the passenger seat in the back.

On the way to his house, Tami just started talking.

“It was hot that night. Unusually hot, and I couldn’t sleep well when Reese worked late. I had the windows open, and I was finally drifting off to the sounds of insects and birds as a lullaby. Then the peace of the night was broken by the wail of sirens. Multiple sirens. It felt like the police, firemen, and ambulances were having a freaking parade.”

She paused when she felt the warmth of a palm on her thigh. She didn’t dare look over at Chandler. If she had to see his warm-brandy eyes, she didn’t know if she could continue.

“I was awake then, so I checked on little Chester, grabbed a cup of tea, and sat on the porch swing. Just listening to all the commotion down the road. It was so close, I knew it had to be someone from the neighborhood. I prayed no one was seriously hurt in whatever had happened. It seemed to go on for hours and I just sat there listening to it. I’m not sure how much time passed when my mother pulled up in my driveway.”

“Tami. You don’t have—”

“I know I don’t have to, but I want to.” They arrived at Chandler’s apartment, but they stayed right where they were, neither attempting to escape the car.

“I think I knew. I mean, when I was woken up by the sirens, I think I knew then that it was Reese. I don’t know how; I just think I did. It’s probably why I left the phone inside and just escaped it all to the front porch. The swing is where I do my best thinking. Anyway, Mom walked up to me and before she said a word, I stood. I asked her to stay with Chester. I turned inside, got dressed, and headed to the hospital without another word.”

She finally met Chandler’s eyes and gasped. There were tears shimmering in the corners ofhiseyes. He wasn’t crying but her story impacted him. It was confusing because she hadn’t even gotten to the sad part.

“I arrived like it was just a normal day and calmly asked about him. The look on the nurse’s face told the story before the doctor came out to tell me Reese was gone. He was gone before he got there, and they said he didn’t suffer. I don’t know if that is true, but I hope so. The doctor excused himself almost immediately and disappeared behind a curtain. I don’t know why, but I followed him to that curtain and peeked through. There was a police officer there and they were stitching the tiniest cut on a man’s head. And he was laughing about how he didn’t feel a thing.”

The hand resting on her thigh moved to her cheek. She turned into the touch. So gentle and comforting. “I returned to the seat I’d been in earlier and just sat there. Before long, I saw the police take the man with the cut outside and I didn’t see him again until I was in a courtroom. They took me back to where Reese was. He was bruised but clean. It wasn’t until the nurse came in to tell me how sorry she was that I finally realized what had happened.”

Her voice failed her. She wanted to tell Chandler the man was drunk and killed her husband and that she didn’t cry until three days later when it finally hit her what had happened, but she couldn’t.

When she looked into his eyes, really looked, she saw she didn’t need to. Chandler had put much of the story together himself.

“He stole your husband and your peace, I may not understand your exact pain, the pain of losing a spouse, but I can relate.”

“I know, Chandler. But do you know how much I hate that you can?”

“Probably about as much as I hate it for you.”

The kiss that followed was intense. More intense than the ghosts of their pain. More intense than the tears they cried, and more intense than the gaping hole people had left in their hearts.

Chandler was the first to break contact with their lips but dropped his forehead to hers. “If we don’t stop now, I’m afraid I’ll throw you over my shoulder and carry you inside and never let you leave. But I don’t want to have you in bed to ward off grief. I want you there because you wouldn’t want to be anywhere else.”

Tami didn’t know what to say to that. A part of her wanted to scream for him to do just that, but instead, the words came out. “Do you want to go to my mom’s wedding weekend as my plus-one?”

11

CHANDLER

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