Page 40 of Beckon

“And that’s my cue.”

After retrieving the jacket from the dryer and sneaking it upstairs, she watched through the slider for a few minutes. Taking in the sight of her family. The family she was meant to have.

“Thank you, Reese.”

She couldn’t help those words that slipped past her lips. He’d played a part in making today almost perfect too. He’d given her a son who, at that very moment, was sliding his burned marshmallow onto a graham cracker being held by Chandler. She could hear him encouraging her son and congratulating him for making the perfect s’more.

Reese had also played a huge role in her accepting herself. “Without you, I would’ve never met him or been brave enough to move on.”

It was as if she felt Reese smiling down on them all in approval.

Tami didn’t rejoin them outside; she was content to watch from her perch on the counter. She’d climbed up there and sat with her legs crossed and the camera of her phone pointed outside.

Harold had his arm around the back of her mom’s chair. Every time she laughed at something someone else said, Harold turned his loving gaze her way. He visually devoured her face. It was like her laughter was the force that powered his soul.

It was when she panned the camera over and zoomed in on Chandler and Chester that she felt that burning sensation behind her eyes. Chester laughed as he was telling a story. Something about cowboys from what she could hear drifting inside through the screen. Based on the phrasing, she was sure it was his version of the story she’d told him about their trip to ride horses.

Chandler hung on every word. He gave Chester positive feedback with his facial expressions, but when her son laughed, Chandler looked at him the way Harold did her mom.

“I love him.” The words were like a curse and a prayer, whispered into the room, empty except for her. “I freaking went and fell in love with him.”

As if her words somehow flew through the screen door and straight to his ears, Chandler shifted his gaze to her and smiled that devastatingly handsome smile of his. The one that fluttered around in her stomach and swelled her heart.

She dashed away to rogue tears that had fallen and lowered the camera. Everyone made their way inside.

“Time for a bath, Mister Man. Go up with Grandma and I’ll be up in a minute. And if you’re okay with it, Chandler wants to tuck you in, what do you think?”

“Yes.” He pumped his little fist as he bounded up the stairs. Before she had time to even take a breath, he was back. Wearing the jacket and sniffing it.

His little body hurdled into her. “Thanks, Mom.”

“For what, sweetheart?”

“For cleaning my jacket, and for making it smell like my buddy.”

He really was too smart for his own good.

13

CHANDLER

“Dude,you sound like you’re at an execution instead of a wedding. Lighten up. You’ve got a spa and your girl, what more could you need?” Tate’s words came through the speaker of his phone and did nothing to calm his nerves. They had the opposite effect, in fact. If Tate could see his nerves, then they all could. Chandler had once been very good, almost too good at hiding his emotions and calming his nerves.

So why is this so damned hard?

Because he planned to say thelword. Chandler had never felt this way about a woman before. He was more of a short-term relationship kind of guy. Now all the sudden, he wasn’t just thinking long term. He was thinking long term with a ready-made family.

“What if she’s not ready for a relationship? She has a kid to think about.”

“A kid you can’t shut up about. What’s this really about?”

What was it really about?

Chandler asked himself that same question at least ten times a day. There was no simple answer. It was about a lot of things. It was about baring his heart to another, something he had zero practice at.

It was about the fact that if they kept going, eventually they’d sleep together. Not just have sex, but sleep in the same bed. He knew enough from all the therapy he’d been doing that until he told someone about the redacted file—until he told Tate—he’d never be able to really get to the heart of what eats away at him.

Could he trade Tate’s peace for his own happiness? That’s what it felt like he would be doing? Or was he underestimating his friend? He didn’t know when he could take that chance.