Page 97 of Must Love Christmas

She nodded. “It’s funny, though. I always pictured you living in London one day.”

“I’d need three flatmates to afford it. Also, London is full of Chelsea fans,” he said with a wry smile at his father.

“As long as you’re happy,” his mother said.

“I am happy.” Simon looked down at his lap, straightening the maroon napkin lying upon it. “In spite of everything.” He gave his father a quick glance, which was met with a supportive nod. Da had been there every day while Simon was in hospital, so he could probably guess what had made him so happy.

“Garen and I are together,” Simon told his mother. “He’s my partner.”

She stopped chewing for a moment, then hurried to swallow. Wiping her mouth with her napkin, she turned to his father. “Did you know about this?”

“Not officially till just now,” Da said with a calm smile. “But it’s not exactly a shocker.”

“Obviously not for you,” she said.

Simon’s scalp prickled with unease. His hopes of them both welcoming the news were fading fast.

His mother tapped her long, red-lacquered fingernails on the table. “You live together,” she said to Simon. “What happens if it doesn’t work out?”

“Dunno, Ma,” he said, feeling his blood pressure rise with each syllable. “I’ve yet to make my post-breakup plans. I’ll put it on my New Year’s to-do list.”

“Don’t joke about this,” she said.

“It’s no joke how kind Garen’s been to me.”

“I know, Simon.” She spread her hands. “But is that enough?”

“No, of course kindness isn’t enough.” He fought to keep his voice down. “But without it, nothing else matters.”

His parents exchanged a look, then his mother started sifting through her mussels, setting aside the empty shells. “It puts you in an awkward position, that’s all,” she said.

“What do you mean?” Simon asked.

“Being dependent on Garen. Your pride’ll always be looking for a way to pay him back so you can be equal.”

His stomach churning, Simon set down his last piece of bruschetta. “We’re already equal.”

“Good,” his mother said, sounding unconvinced. “Then I’m happy for you.”

“Good,” he replied, equally unconvinced by her statement. “Me too.”

To his relief, their main course arrived then, severing the conversation.

As he ate his penne without tasting it, Simon fumed over what his mother had just said. He didn’t feel dependent on Garen, despite his partner’s near-smothering watchfulness. If Simon accepted help when it was needed, surely that was a sign of strength. He’d been told over and over that he had to adjust to his limitations, embrace the fact he couldn’t get through this alone.

But how were his needs affecting their relationship? Were they creating a gap in power that would never close, even after Simon returned to full strength?

The road ahead wouldn’t be easy for them, Simon knew. But as long as he and Garen stayed honest—and yes, kind—they could certainly navigate that road together.

Right?

Chapter 21

8 Days UntilChristmas

“Does this place bring back terrible memories?” Garen asked as he and Gillian set Simon up behind the Jingle Bell Rocks registration table at Shawlands Rink. Then he immediately second-guessed himself for bringing up one of the worst days of Simon’s life.

Just once,try not voicing every thought aloud,he told himself, though he knew such reminders were futile.

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