Page 106 of Redeemed

“I was trying to make sure you didn’t die,” I mutter under my breath.

But, of course, Colton hears.

“You knew not to believe a damn thing that came out of Mark’s mouth,” he snaps.

“I told him because I cared about you. Why do you refuse to see that?”

“Because you obviously didn’t.” He closes the book and stands. “If you cared, you would’ve called me the second Mark left.”

“But—”

“I don’t want to hear your excuses again. You can say you cared all you want, but your actions didn’t match up with that.”

“I was scared! All I could think was that there was at least a slim possibility that Mark was telling the truth. That you were actually in over your head. It wasn’t worth the risk of losing you. I’m sorry for how things turned out, really, I am, but I did what I thought was best.”

“It wasn’t good enough.”

I bristle. “Well, maybe if you’d explained what was in the briefcase, then I would’ve understood why I needed to keep my mouth shut.”

“Why was it so hard to just fucking trust us?” he shouts.

The anger in his voice clings to my skin before sinking deep. Just like that, I’m hyper-aware of every movement Colton makes, every breath he takes.

“Colton,” I say, keeping my voice soft and placating, “I know you’re hurt, but I promise—”

His laugh is sharp, bitter. “Hurt? No, angel. The hurt passed years ago. This?” He gestures to himself, to the tense way he’s holding himself and the dark look on his face. “This is hatred.”

I don’t think I believe him.

“It’s all for you,” he continues, his voice venomous, “and it’s well deserved.”

Star nudges my hand, and I realize I stopped petting her when Colton shouted. I start up again, sliding my fingers over her soft fur.

If Colton could just be reasonable for five minutes, maybe we could get somewhere. Despite everything he and the guys have done to me, I still miss them. I fell into such a deep and trusting friendship with them so fast, and it still feels like there’s a hole in my chest from when they cut me off.

“Well, I disagree,” I mutter as I drop my gaze to Star. She’s purring under my touch. It’s a glimmer of happiness in a world full of nothing but pain.

Colton releases a frustrated breath and stalks toward me. He raises the hardcover in his hand, and I flinch instinctively. All he does is place it back on the shelf, and I kick myself for reacting like that. I’m sure it’ll only piss him off more.

But he doesn’t yell again. All he does is stare at the line of books, a mix of memoirs and biographies. His jaw clenches before he finally says, “I would never hit you, Haven. Not like that.”

My spine straightens on instinct. “What do you mean,not like that?”

Colton’s gaze returns to me, and it roams over my face slowly. He’s thinking. Weighing his options. Deciding how much he wants to reveal to me. “Sometimes, pain is needed.”

“And let me guess, you’re the one who gets to decide when that is?”

“Well, considering you almost got raped, kidnapped, and run over by a car last night—all by three different men—I’d say you’re not fit to make any decisions about your wellbeing.”

“I didn’t almost—” But then I clamp my mouth shut.

Aaron wasn’t going to rape me. Despite what Colton thinks he saw, when I told Aaron to stop, he did. But Colton is right, just not in the way he thinks he is. If Isaiah had gotten his hands on me, it would’ve happened. Probably not immediately, but eventually.

“What you need is determined by me, Xander, and Lucas now. That’s part of our agreement—us taking care of you.”

“You hitting me doesn’t sound like it fits in with that,” I grind out.

“It does.” He traces his fingers along my jawbone with a deceptively soft touch. “You’ll understand soon. Unless you choose to cooperate, that is.”

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