Page 115 of Fauxmance

Hayden:I wouldn't hate it either.

Again, it felt like we were flirting, but the fact remained: We weren't actually together.

Hayden sent another text while I was thinking.

Hayden:Seriously though, I'd love it if you came.

I couldn't say no to that—and I didn't want to.

Me:I'll be there. It sounds awesome. Can't wait to hearyou guys play!

Hayden:Yes!!! You rock, girlfriend. See you soon.

This was it, I thought. Tonight, I'd go see Hayden's band and somehow work up the nerve to casually ask if he had any real feelings for me. Like the ones I had for him. Easy-peasy, right? Dr. M had told me it was what she'd do. I tried convincing myself that, no matter if he felt the same, it would be better to know.

But then why did the thought make me feel ill?

I went home, did some homework, and tried my best to distract myself. The hours went by quickly. Mom had a lot of work to do—it was one of the peak times of year for weddings—so I left her to it. As I was leaving, though, I did stick my head into her work room to say goodbye.

"I'm heading out, Mom," I said.

"Okay, drive safe," she said, the pins in her mouth distorting her words. "Say hi to Hayden for me. I'll see you when you get back."

"Will do."

"Is his band any good?"

"Yeah. I've only heard one song they recorded, but I'm sure if Hayden's in it, it'll be awesome."

She smiled.

"What's that look?" I said.

"Nothing," she said. "I'm just glad to see you with someone who makes you so happy."

My stomach clenched, and I wanted to tell her right then about the fake relationship, how I felt, how nervous I was to put it all on the line. Everything bubbled up inside of me, wanting to get out, but I tamped it down. Mom wouldn't understand why I hadn't told her the truth right from the start. I usually told her everything. We were close like that. But this was just something I wasn't prepared to admit.

"I love you, Mom," I said.

She rolled her eyes. "Yeah, yeah, get out of here, Magnolia. Go have fun. Oh, and I love you more."

With that, she turned back to her work, and I went to meet up with Hayden.

Traffic was a nightmare. There were a ton of cars on the road. Night had fallen, and the streetlights were on by the time I made it to my destination. From the outside, The Sleepy Turtle looked like a hole in the wall. Hayden and his band were supposed to be performing at 9:00 pm on the main stage. I had no trouble finding it. Inside, the place was a typical restaurant-bar combo with a few tables and booths. There were several people dancing in the center of the room. And behind them, I spotted a raised platform stage along the wall. That was where Hayden and the guys were setting up.

When he saw me, Hayden jogged over.

"You made it," he said, pulling me into a hug.

I closed my eyes a moment, savoring the closeness, before we broke apart.

"You find a parking space, okay?"

"Barely," I said. "You didn't tell me you guys were so popular."

"We're not really," he said.

I shot a look around at the room full of people. "Yeah, I can see that."

---