Page 117 of Knot Her Mountain Men

“These are so great!”

Calendars were one of my pet projects, combining my photos and Ryder’s. We’d also ordered a bunch of prints on canvas to fill up the walls at the lodge. All of them would be available for purchase or order if they wanted a different size or material. Maverick had set up an online gallery of all our favorites that could be purchased as well.

Keeping mentally busy helped me stay steady. I hadn’t really been outside; even standing in the yard, playing fetch with Pumpkin with all my alphas around me, had made me twitchy.

Baby steps.

Getting abandoned was a lot different than being directly assaulted in the woods I loved. Both traumatic, but not the same.

We settled on exposure therapy, as well as actual therapy I would attend every couple of weeks in town.

“Ready to go out?” Kit asked, popping his head into the office.

With a sigh, I got to my feet, Pumpkin rousing from her nap on the floor near me to follow.

Migratory birds had started returning, a sure sign that winter was losing its grip. In a few weeks songbirds would fill the morning, and maybe the forest wearing a new spring outfit would change it enough in my brain that I could stop associating it with Brandon. I tried not to worry about it too much. The trauma was so fresh I couldn’t expect to be free of it this quickly.

I threw a stick for Pumpkin in the dappled sunlight. Maverick and Ryder stayed where I could see them, close by, but not near enough to get nailed by the stick if I wasn’t paying attention while throwing. Bear and Kit guarded the perimeter, making slow sweeps around the lodge and surrounding woods.

When I started to waver, Ryder slipped his arms around me. “You’re safe. We’re right here.”

I stood there, going through my box breathing exercises, all four of them navigating toward me until their tsunami of love overwhelmed my incoming panic attack.

“I’m okay,” I told them, voice soft. I sent them off again after a few minutes, staying in Ryder’s embrace. Love shone so brightly in his eyes, and I hadn’t even told him yet. No time like the present to claim who was mine. I stood on my toes to brush my lips against his. “I love you.”

The surge of emotions from him almost knocked me off my feet. He held me tightly, cupping my head, cheek pressed to my hair. “I love you too, firecracker. So fucking much.”

Maverick looked curiously over, and while I wanted to say the same thing to him, I wasn’t sure if it would take away from Ryder’s moment to do so now.

“What are you worrying about?” Ryder asked.

I told him plainly and he only laughed, holding me tighter. “I’d be pissed if I stopped you and the situation was swapped. He deserves to hear it, and I’m not an insecure jackass. I know you don’t love me any less just because you’re telling him too.”

Ryder stole a kiss that had lust sparking in my core and my toes curling. He spun me around to face Mav. I took a tentative step toward him, his anticipatory excitement giving away that he had overheard our conversation.

Before I could open my mouth, he swept closer, kissing me every bit as fiercely as Ryder had done. As he pulled away to speak, he whispered against my lips, “I love you.”

I could barely breathe past the joy flooding the bond from both of them. “I love you too, Maverick.”

Old Morgan wouldn’t understand me saying those words. Luckily, she didn’t need to. She didn’t exist anymore. She had been burned away and reborn in the heat that had given me the key to everything I had always wanted.

Finally.

“You guys, you can’t have any. Chocolate is bad for babies.”

Pumpkin and Muffin didn’t care, both of them staring pleadingly at me while I arranged cookie dough on a sheet for Maverick’s copycat Girl Scout treat. The troop we had booked for a guided hike wouldn’t be coming out for another couple of weeks and I wanted to fulfill his craving until we could get our hands on some authentic boxes.

Muffin and Pumpkin wiggled happily, wagging their tails. They’d been best friends since Muffin’s arrival. One sniff and a quick play session, and they were sisters for life.

“Come on, you two.” Maverick got on his knees, snaring an arm around each of them. “You’re slowing Mom down.”

Once the cookies were safely in the oven, I got onto my knees with the dogs, fetching a treat for each of them from their jar on my way down. They both scarfed them down excitedly.

Maverick’s eyes gleamed when he caught my gaze. “Ready for this afternoon?”

Desire rolled through me. “I might be.”

Exposure therapy had been going well. Between the walks and the therapy and Muffin’s arrival, the forest had gotten a little more comfortable every day. It wasn’t perfect, and sometimes the panic would hit me out of nowhere, but just like I had chosen not to let Brandon take me from my pack, I had been fighting not to allow him to take the forest too.