Page 28 of Merry Mix-Up

I poured myself a glass and put the container back in the fridge and heard my phone chime. When I looked down at the notification, I wasn't even the least bit surprised.

Amber 5:53 PM: I'm sorry, bud. I'm just not feeling up for it.

If she didn't want to go in public, that was okay. I just craved her so badly. Just being around her made me feel happier. I never wanted that feeling to stop. It was like she had a way of soothing the very wavelengths of my existence.

Newt 5:54 PM: Then I'll come over. We can watch a cheesy Christmas movie and make fun of the bad tropes.

I hitSendand took another gulp of my eggnog, but already her fingers were typing a response.

Amber 5:55 PM: I don't know. Jade's kinda sick now too. Probably won’t appreciate company.

Everything she said just felt like an excuse, but I tried not to think that way. It was cold and flu season and there was every chance she was really just sick. I just couldn’t shake the unnerving feeling that something was going on. I had my ex to thank for that. Being cheated on had a way of destroying a man's ability to trust again. I had to battle those thoughts, though, because I knew Amber wasn't like my ex, or at least I hoped she wasn't.

Newt 5:57 PM: Then come over. House is empty and I have Lysol to kill germs. lol Mom and Dad are going to the pageant and I'll be alone and lonely.

This time she didn't respond, at least not for a while. I finished the eggnog and rinsed the glass, then went to the bedroom and hid from Mom so I didn't have to make an excusefor why I wasn't going to the pageant. I heard Dad come home and the two of them bustle around, and somewhere about six thirty, the house grew quiet. I thought about picking up my phone and nudging Amber for a reply, but she had left me on read. That meant she was either considering it or didn't want to keep saying no.

I scrolled my socials as the house got darker, the sun setting and taking any natural light with it. My stomach rumbled, and I considered getting food but had no motivation to get up, even to walk to the door for a delivery driver, so I just kept scrolling. And when the doorbell rang, I ignored that too. Everyone in town would be at the pageant. Naomi wouldn't ring. She'd just walk in. So I figured it was carolers making their rounds or something.

But when my phone chimed and it was a message from Amber, I sat up in bed with a smile.

Amber 6:38 PM: You gonna leave me standing in the cold all night?

I rushed to the front door and flung it open to see her in her pink puffer coat, hugging herself and shivering. I looked out at the driveway, but her car wasn't there. I was confused.

"Where did you park?" I asked, stepping aside so she could come in.

"Car was dead again, so Dad will have to fix it. I Ubered," she said, and I heard her shivering.

I'd have bought her a new battery or even a new car if she’d let me, but I was just glad she was here.

"I'm so glad you came," I hummed and shut the door, turning to catch her hand as she slid her coat off. She didn't look so sick, but even that mattered very little to me right now. She was here, and that was all I wanted. "Let's go find something to eat." I led her toward the kitchen with only one thing on my mind—soaking up every second of her time and enjoying being with her. My soul was at rest again.

19

JADE

Newt was so amazing. He made me a bowl of soup and some grilled cheese, though I really didn't need the special treatment. I hadn't eaten, but only because I had no appetite. Boredom did that to me. I found myself doom scrolling or sleeping to kill time. Just getting out of the house after feeling cooped up all day was nice. But being with him was nicer.

"Thank you," I told him as I slurped bites of soup and nibbled on the grilled cheese. He was busy enjoying his own bowl of soup, but he smiled over the rim as he tipped it to his lips to sip.

"You're welcome," he grunted as he set the empty bowl down and wiped his mouth. "Is it good?"

The canned concoction was no better or worse than the brand I typically bought, but the fact that I hadn't had to cook for myself, and he was my company, made it seem like a gourmet feast.

"It was delicious, thank you." I took another bite, though I was starting to get full already. Pretending to be sick sucked, but it had helped me avoid Derek. Amber must have put him on a leash or something. Otherwise, he'd have shown up at my apartment demanding to be let in. As it was, I had to leave mycar out front just in case he drove past the place and thought I wasn't home. Amber told him I was so sick that I had demanded no one come by. If he saw my car gone, he'd be standing there banging.

"Not being able to see you for almost forty-eight hours was torture," Newt said, taking my hand. He hadn't brought up the "exclusivity" conversation yet, but I wasn’t sure what to tell him if he did. I wanted more than anything to say yes, but I felt he deserved an explanation first. Even if it blew things up with Naomi, I wanted him to know what Amber and I were doing and I wanted him to hear it from me.

"Torture? You're that addicted to me?" I joked, and I chuckled so hard I almost snorted like Amber when she got to laughing hard.

"Yes, and I need a fix…" He brought my hand to his lips and kissed it softly. "And I don't just mean sex." Newt sighed and had a dreamy look in his eye, one that was so unnatural for a man, I could almost tell what he was going to say before he opened his mouth and said, "I think I'm falling in love with you, Amber."

I had to force myself not to wince when he said my sister's name. It took a lot of mental focus to keep my smile looking genuine and not fake, but once the initial shock of hearing her name wore off, the surprising warmth of affection swelled in my chest. I was falling for him too, so hard it was going to hurt like hell if this didn’t work out.

"Newt, I…." I struggled, desperately needing him to know I was Jade and not Amber, but my mind wrestled with the idea that if I told him and he knew we were going behind his sister's back, he'd be hurt anyway.

"It's okay. I know you might feel like this is going too fast, but I just needed to say that. You make me different, Mav." The use of the nickname was even starting to have the same effect on me. I wanted so badly to hear my name on his lips. "When I'maround you, I feel calm and confident and full. And when you're not around me I feel, like, this desperation to get to you and see you and make sure this is real."

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