Page 61 of Pack Down Bad

I might be tearing us apart for no reason, but this is the only decision I know how to make.

“This doesn’t mean I’m leaving forever,” I clarify. “Consider this a temporary thing so that I can get my bearings again and assess things with the three of you more logically.”

Knox grunts a sound of disgust.

Percy shakes his head. “You’re a romance writer, Belle. You know as well as anyone that successful relationships are as much about feelings as they are about logic. Is leaving what you really want?”

There’s a pregnant pause. I can practically feel them holding their breath, waiting for my answer.

“For now, yes,” I answer honestly, even though the words feel like a gut punch, and I’ve delivered the blow to myself.

“You want to leave us?” Knox grinds out, raising his head to level me with a hurt expression. “After we shared some of the most special days of our lives together, you want toleave us?”

“This isn’t like that,” I protest.

I’m notleaving,leaving. Just taking a breather.

“You can’t leave us, Snow Bunny.” The anger dissipates, and Rhys’s voice cracks. “We’re crazy sorry about lying to you.”

“Crazy sorry,” Percy echoes while Knox agrees, “So fucking sorry.”

My resolve is weakening. Denying them feels so painful when deep down I do ultimately want to stay. But if I stay right now instead of taking space to forgive them and be sure of my choice, will I live to regret being swayed?

I don’t want to take that risk. Ultimately, that makes the decision for me.

“I have to, just for now.” I hold my arms out in a silent plea, desperate to draw them in for long hugs before Mia shows up. She drives like a practiced long-haul trucker, so she’s likely to make her way here from town in record time.

Begrudgingly, each man makes his way over to indulge my desire for hugs.

Percy goes first. He remains silent as he gives me a gentle, lingering squeeze. I’m grateful his hug doesn’t feel like a goodbye because it reassures me they’re going to allow me to return.

Because Iamcoming back here. Just by choice and with the truth, the next time.

Rhys goes second, practically squeezing the life out of me.

“Come back to us, Snow Bunny,” Rhys murmurs next to my ear before pulling away. He pauses to hold me by the arms and take a long look deep into my eyes, memorizing every fleck of color in mine. He stays like that until Knox nudges him out of the way.

Knox steps in front of me without immediately embracing me. For a second, I think he’s going to refuse to hug me, but then his arms snake around my waist and he yanks me in against his chest. He cups the back of my head with one hand, cradling me to him like he wants to curl around me and keep me there forever.

“I’m coming back, Knox,” I whisper into his bicep. “Ipromise.”

He grunts an acknowledgement and continues to cling to me. Several minutes must pass before he finally speaks, “Your nest will be here waiting for you.”

I know he’s trying to offer me a reassurance, but his words don’t make it easier to leave. They make it harder.

And I guess that makes sense because leaving home isn’t meant to be easy.

* * *

“So...” Mia clears her throat.

I knew riding in silent contemplation for the first half of the car ride was too good to be true.

“Can we talk about the situation at the bar now?” Mia drums her hands anxiously on the steering wheel. “Because there’s something I think you need to know.”

I hold my hand up, then remember her eyes are on the road. “I don’t have the emotional bandwidth for that right now, Mia. I just found my scent-matches, went through heat with them, and walked out on them all in one fell swoop. And to be honest, I don’t care about the thing with you and Jason. Theonlyalphas I care about now are the ones I just walked away from.”

I’m already unsure how long I’ll be able to stay away, if I’m being honest with myself. I have the urge to beg Mia to turn around and drive me back up the mountain to them. Back where I feel like I belong. Aside from needing to pick up my laptop, I’m not sure what’s waiting for me back at my apartment.

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