Page 59 of What I've Tasted of Desire

Oh, I’m gonna gut you like a fish for this, you motherfucker. I’ll use your blood to write a fucking sonnet about how amazing it felt to watch the life slowly drain from your eyes.

As gut-wrenching as it was to see Alex like this, I couldn’t deny the pangs of excitement I felt. It was like I had just been formally given permission to do something I’d been dreaming about for years.

Tom’s death will stretch out for day-s-s-s…

“It’s okay, baby. I’ve got you…” I murmured absently as I stroked his hair out of his face, my psyche split between taking care of Alex, and all the fun and interesting ways I was going to inflict pain upon Tom’s body.

He finally moved himself away from the toilet bowl, and I slid my boxers down. I got Alex’s pants off from around his knees and lifted him off the floor. Alex had completely checked out. He was still conscious—well, his eyes were open at least—but he’d gone completely boneless. If I let him go, he’d collapse onto the floor. I wrapped a strong arm around his torso and lifted him up into the spray. He leaned against my side as I used a cloth to wash the mess off his face, arms and neck.

I asked him if I had gotten it all, and he didn’t respond. I lifted him back out of the shower and wrapped a clean towel around his shoulders. He clasped his hands around the edge of the towel as he shivered and leaned against the wall. After a moment, his knees buckled and I caught him before he fell. I slowly lowered him to the bathroom floor and he scrunched himself into the corner with the towel wrapped around his shoulders, staring off into the wall with glassy eyes.

Quickly, I stood under the shower and washed myself off. I wrapped a towel around my waist.

“I’m going to get us some clean clothes,” I told him softly before walking out of the bathroom and into his bedroom.

I riffled through his closet and drawers. All he had besides the soiled jammies were jeans.

You need to take that boy shopping.

I dug through my own overnight bag and pulled out a pair of sweats with a drawstring and a plain undershirt. I’d be able to easily slide the sweats around Alex and tie them up. I grabbed a pair of jeans and a black long-sleeve for myself and headed back into the bathroom.

When are you going to kill him? You can’t leave Alex alone…

I shook off the intrusive, exciting thoughts of torturing Tom and tried to focus on taking care of Alex. On seeing us through this mess.

Alex was in the same spot as when I left him. I doubt he even moved a muscle. I managed to get his legs into the sweats and hoisted his ass off the ground enough to slide them up and tie them around his waist. Once we were both dressed, I walked him back to his room and deposited him on the bed, just as I heard sirens coming down the street.

“I’m gonna go downstairs and deal with the police. If they want to talk to you, I’ll bring them up here. I don’t want you coming downstairs again until everything is cleaned up, okay?”

“D-don’t leave me.”

My heart broke as his weak plea hit my ears. I leaned over and wiped a stray tear that had escaped from the corner of his eye. “I’ll never leave you, baby. I’m so sorry this happened. I’ll be right back.”

I didn’t know where Alex had dropped his phone, so I grabbed mine, put hissleepy timeplaylist on low, and set it on the nightstand.

No worries, my darling boy. Wewillget it taken care of…

When I came back downstairs, the front door was closed. No one had made it inside yet. I stuck my bare feet into my boots by the door and walked outside.

There were three cop cars in the driveway. Two officers were photographing the dogin situon my truck, and two more were talking to Mike on the other side of the driveway.

I walked up to Mike and the officers. “This is the boyfriend,” Mike said as I approached.

Not a huge fan of his tone… ‘the boyfriend’. Jealous much?

“Your name?” one of the officers asked, turning towards me.

“Gabriel Vasquez.”

“And it’s your vehicle that was vandalized?”

“Yes.”

“And you were here all night?” he continued.

“Yeah. I got here a little after seven, I think.”

“Nothing out of the ordinary when you arrived?”

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