Page 76 of The Player + The Pact = I Do

“Are you okay?” Jules asks eventually.

“I’m a fool,” I say finally. “How could I have ever loved her? How could I have let Nadia get so close? What is the matter with me that I can build a successful business like I’m riding a bike, but I can’t read people?”

“That’s bullshit,” she says, her voice harsh compared to the saccharine-sweetness she poured on for Caroline.

I choke out a laugh. “Not from where I’m sitting.”

“Then you need to sit over here. Firstly, running a business like yours isn’t easy. You work really hard and you’re completely committed. Secondly, you were a teenager whenCaroline Hammond got her talons into you. You were a kid. And Nadia? Who the fuck is she, anyway? Some woman you knew for five minutes who probably had nice tits and gave a great blow job? She wanted something from you and she got it because you weren’t focused onher—you were focused on your business. She was just white noise.”

I laugh at the way Jules puts things.White noise?

“You can’t give yourself a hard time about either of those women. Yes, they were using you, but everyone uses everyone. That’s just life. You needed a fiancée; I wanted a job at The Mayfair. New York City needs more apartments and you want more money. A billionaire wants a hot wife and a hot girl wants billions. That’s the way it is. You’ve just got to make sure you’re getting what you need while everyone else is getting what they want. Separate transactional relationships from your friends and family—the ones who would walk through fire or bury a body for you. You have more people like that in your life than most. Those are the people you need to spend your energy on. Everyone else can fuck off.”

“I never thought of my relationship with Caroline as transactional.”

“That’s why it smarts with Caroline—because she took what she wanted from you and didn’t give you what you wanted in return. But that’s one woman, one time in your life. You’re one of the most powerful men in Manhattan. That’s not going to happen again.”

“How can you be so sure?”

“You’re not eighteen anymore,” she says. “You’re smarter. You’re more experienced. And you know when to trust your heart and when to trust your gut.”

“Do I?” I ask. I’m not so sure.

“You do. You’re talking abouttwoinstances wheresomeone has used you in over a decade. But people are actually using you all the time and, importantly, vice versa.”

“That’s not true,” I say. When did Jules get so cynical?

“What about real estate agents? They use you. You think they’d be as nice to you if you weren’t the biggest developer in New York City? Of course not. But you need them, too. It’s just business. It’s a mutually predatory relationship. It’s a trade. Just like us.”

“Like us?”

“I said yes to being your fiancée because you said I could manage The Mayfair. It’s… it was business.”

“And now? You move out tomorrow and that’s it?”

She holds my gaze.

“That’s the end of our arrangement,” she says.

What if I want a new arrangement?

“Right.” I can’t think of anything else to say. I like Jules. Really like her. And I don’t think what we have together is any kind of trade. We’re not using each other. Are we? Is she? I know she wants the permanent job at the hotel. But that’s not why we’re sleeping together, is it?

I shake my head. That can’t be it, or she wouldn’t be moving out. She’d be trying to stay.

One thing I know for certain is that being with Jules doesn’t feel like being with Caroline or Nadia. Jules feels like she fits with me in a way I knew I didn’t with Caroline—or maybe it was all too long ago to remember. Now, with the awards ceremony behind me, memories of me and Caroline are fading. The hatred and disgust I have for her and myself for falling for her seem further away, like they were part of another life. Another lifetime.

I’m more focused on theweof me and Jules, and why she’s so keen to move out. Doesn’t she want to stay?

“Tonight is the end of our business arrangement,” I say. “Tomorrow is a fresh start.”

She’s staring straight ahead, her expression closed to me. I want to know what she’s thinking.

“Let’s have lunch tomorrow. Talk about some stuff.” I need tonight to sort things out in my brain. Asking Jules to stay living in my guest room doesn’t seem like the right thing to do, but if I ask her to share the master? I’m not sure either of us is ready for that.

“I can’t tomorrow. I’m meeting my dad for coffee and then he’s coming to meet you, remember? I figure I can pretty much drop him off at your door. At least that way I know he’ll show.”

She smiles at me and slides her hand into mine.

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