Page 30 of Hushed

She reached for him, and he gave her a big bear hug. Having his arms around her combined with the scent that enveloped her as she rested her head against his chest, overwhelmed her with memories of their time together and stirred things in her she’d suppressed.

Damn she still wanted him after all these years.

Chapter 6

Gage

“What the hell were you thinking, Kenz?” Gage asked as he closed the door to her apartment. He’d stayed quiet for the drive over, and now it took work to keep the frustration out of his voice.

He didn’t want her to think he was mad at her. It was the bastards who ran that sleazy club that he wanted to unleash on. Calling themselves a kink club and then treating new people like pieces of meat was completely unacceptable, and it made the entire community look bad. Just because mainstream society didn’t understand BDSM, didn’t mean that BDSM clubs had to be scary places.

She looked like she was going to cry as he stared at her, waiting for an answer. She chewed her nails nervously, and he gently pulled her hand away from her face.

Finally, she responded. “I wanted to check out a club, and that’s the one that would let me in the door.”

Gage couldn’t help the curse that came out. “They’ll fucking let anyone in.” He quickly clarified, “That’s not a disparagement of you. But you don’t want to mess with clubs that don’t vet their attendees. It’s dangerous.”

“I might have known that if you wouldn’t change the subject any time I bring up kink.”

She was baiting him. But she was also right. He’d been taking care of her from afar for the past several years while staying out of the same room with her, and several times when they talked in the early years, she would hint at wanting to talk about BDSM or the club that he ran, and he would avoid her questions entirely or give her an evasive answer when he couldn’t.

He stayed out of New York because the temptation was too strong. Being here with her now proved that. But he couldn’t let her keep putting herself in danger because of her curiosity. That wasn’t keeping his promise to Reggie.

“You want me to answer your questions?”

She nodded eagerly. “Please.”

Alarm bells rang in his head as he moved across the room to her.Bad idea, Gage. You’re going to fuck this up.But he’d already made his decision. He looked her in the eye and hoped his expression conveyed how serious he was. “We’re doing this my way or not at all.”

He knew his fate was sealed when she looked up at him and whispered, “What’s your way?”

Tucking a hand under her chin, he made sure she couldn’t look away. “First tell me this, little imp. What part of kink intrigues you most?”

Her face scrunched, and he was dying to know what was going through her head. “How do I answer that? There are so many aspects to it.”

“Is it about kinky sex, power exchange, morbid curiosity about what I do?”

She backed away from him and sat in a dining room chair. “You’re making me feel very judged right now.”

Taking a moment to collect his thoughts, Gage dragged a hand down his face. “That’s not my intention. But I need to understand why you’re pursuing this now, so I can tailor my answers to your needs. It’s not meant to sound judgmental. I’m genuinely curious.”

A storm of emotions and conflicting thoughts raged in her eyes before she took a deep breath and opened up to him. “I’m still coming up short in the sex department. No one I’ve been with puts in any effort, and I’m bored before we’re done. But the little taste you gave me all those years ago… It quieted my mind more than any of the ADHD meds or coping practices I’ve tried since I started treatment. I’ve been looking for something similar since then. I’m curious if more of this lifestyle would work for me. And yeah, I want to explore all the kinky sex.”

It was a more thoughtful answer than he’d been expecting, which was a good thing, but hearing her talk about the fact that she’d slept with other men since their night together had him clenching his fists and breathing slowly to keep the jealousy at bay. It had been five years. Of course, she’d been with other people. It was stupid of him to expect otherwise. That wasn’t important. Right now, she deserved his full attention, and she had a lot to learn, so he put his kink educator hat on and focused on what he could teach her.

“In your research, have you found anything that sounds like it would work for you?” It was a question he would ask anyone new to the kink scene, but he was especially curious about her answers.

“I want to try power exchange and pain play. Or really any play that is highly sensory.”

He pulled out another dining room chair and flipped it around so he could straddle it and rest his arms on the back. “Just so I’m one hundred percent clear, what is your role in both of those? Are you the Dom or the sub? Are you the one giving pain or are you receiving it?”

Her face turned red, but she flashed him a grin. “You gonna let me use a flogger on you if I say I want to give pain?”

He let out a staccato laugh. “Hell no.”

Kenzie smirked. “I didn’t think so. Research gave me the term switch. I’m fairly sure I have some switch tendencies, but I definitely fall closer to the submissive side.”

He had so many more questions for her, but he didn’t want to turn this into an interrogation.

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