Page 15 of The Cold Ride

Grinding my teeth, I nodded. One more day wouldn’t hurt. And I didn’t care if I had to hire a fucking attorney to get visitation rights. Amelia was my daughter. I wanted her to know me, and I wanted more than anything to know her.

Instead I said, “You must miss him,” while wondering if there was another man that Rory had shacked up with who also happened to be in the military and was calling himself her dad.

“Oh, I do. I mean, I’ve not met him yet. But Mom says he’ll come for me one day.” She smiled with the blissful enthusiasm and innocence only children have. And she sounded so assured. She believed without a doubt I would come for her.

She wasn’t wrong. There was nothing I wouldn’t do for her. “He will. I guarantee it. And he’ll be over the moon to have you as a daughter.”

And I’d at least had my question answered. Rory hadn’t passed off another man as her father. I didn’t understand why, but it settled some of my rage.

Amelia blushed and preened at my comment, then asked, “Can I see the motorcycles? I’ve never seen one up close before, and they looked really cool.”

“If you play your cards right, I could give you a ride on mine.” I offered, but then I thought about her safety. I’d have to research how to safely ride with a nine-year-old on my bike. Worst-case scenario, I find a nearby Harley dealer and have a sidecar attached for her to ride in.

Her eyes went wide at the prospect. “Really? That would be so cool. My friends at school will be so jealous. Can we go as soon as we’re done with dinner?”

“Amelia, not tonight, honey. You’ve got homework to finish and need a shower before bed,” Rory interceded. A part of me wanted to argue because if I wanted to take her for a ride, then I should be allowed to do it, and I shouldn’t need her permission. But I was also feeling punchy. And this was my first foray into fatherhood. I had a steep learning curve, but I would figure it out as I went.

Amelia opened her mouth to argue, but Rory cut her off. “I’m not saying no forever, just for tonight. It’s already getting dark out. If they haven’t left already when you get home from school tomorrow, and James is still willing to take you, then you can go. And I’m sure James will be the soul of propriety when he takes you for a ride.”

Amelia sighed and speared some lettuce with her fork before glancing at me. “Okay. If I didn’t have stupid math to do, I could go with you. But no, Miss Davies loves giving us homework.”

I fought back a grin at her candor. Fuck, this girl was a pistol. And I wanted to applaud Rory’s parenting skills. She effectively squelched any bitching while leaving the door open for Amelia and me to bond before I had to hit the road with these guys.

However, the thought of leaving left me cold. It was what Evan asked of us. But I didn’t want to leave Amelia when I’d just found her. I wanted to spend whatever time I had left before I had to report back to base with her.

“If you need help with your math, I’m not so bad at the subject,” I offered, thinking it might be another way to eke out more time with her.

“You can have at it. Because this so-called new math... whoever invented it, I’d like to give them a piece of my mind.” Rory snorted and took a sip of wine.

“It can’t be that bad.”

It was Amelia who answered. “The only time Mom curses is when she’s helping me with my math homework.”

At that, everyone at the table, myself included, broke into fits of laughter. Rory toasted us with her glass of wine, and the mischief in her eyes reminded me of the woman I fell for all those years ago. The night she conceived Amelia.

I felt the same punch of desire I had all those years ago. I couldn’t want her still, could I? I’d be an idiot to get started up with her again.

But it wasn’t lost on me either that, unlike before, we were both single this time around.

But then I squelched that train of thought. I couldn’t trust Rory, not after she’d hidden my daughter from me. I’d have to be an idiot to let myself fall for her again.

7

Well, that wasn’t as bad as it could have been.

Relief washed over me. Dinner went off without a hitch. Although, there was a moment there when I thought James was going to spill the tea and tell Amelia he was her father. And it’s not that I wasn’t going to tell her he was her father, I just... was being a coward. I wanted one more night where she was just mine. One more night before everything changed.

I made sure she was sound asleep before I left our place and headed into the main inn. The guys had grabbed some folding chairs and set them up in the lobby. It was as good a place as any for the upcoming conversation. What was so important that they had to travel all this way to deliver? What had Evan sent me?

“Did Amelia get off to sleep all right?” James asked with anger blazing in his eyes. And I didn’t blame him. He was justified because I had withheld Amelia’s existence.

But being near him again had awoken thoughts and feelings I’d not had in forever. We might have only been together for a single night, but it left its mark on me. And I wasn’t strictly speaking about finding out I was pregnant either. To this day, it had been the most intimate, amazing night of my life—until I messed everything up. And I’d give anything to have him look at me the way he did that night.

In all these years, there had never been anyone else. The moment he touched me, I knew no other man would ever measure up. So I focused on being a mom and businesswoman with no time for anything else.

It’s tough carrying a torch for someone who wanted nothing to do with you. “Yes. She always fights it up until she gets into bed. And then she’s out like a light. Unlike me. She definitely doesn’t get it from me.” I glanced across the space at James. And I saw the questions burning in his eyes.

He had every right to be pissed at me.

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