Page 36 of When You Wish Upon a Wideout

“I’ve got one more year in me,” he admitted. “I wish I could say I’d play forever until I win it all for him, but I’mtired.”

Beau was tired—tired of getting hit, of worrying about injuries, of training harder each year because the competition only got younger and faster as he grew older.

“You’re an old man now,” Sienna teased, bumping her shoulder against his.

“I just want to have somefun, you know? All these years, I’ve been the serious guy. I train hard as hell off-season, I play as hard as I can during the season. Rinse and repeat. It tastes awful.”

Sienna raised an eyebrow. “You’re telling me that million-dollar contracts and traveling, fame, notoriety, all that tastes awful?”

Beau pressed his lips together for a moment. “It tastes awfully lonely. All that stuff doesn’t mean shit.” He motioned to the boxes. “You can’t take it with you.”

Sienna’s eyes drifted across the room, and she stayed silent for a moment.

“What are you thinking?” Beau asked.

“I’m thinking,” she started, “that I based my whole identity on preparing myself to do this exact thing for Grace. And now that I’m starting to believe I finally won’t have to, I should be happy. Iamhappy, honestly. But I never built anything beyond being a mom and taking care of the bar. I guess loneliness doesn’t discriminate against the rich and poor or famous and nobodies.”

“You’re not a nobody.”

“No.” Sienna sighed. “But I’m realizing I’m just a body. Like a robot. Sometimes, it feels like I haven’t lived since... ” She paused, shaking her head.

Beau nudged her. “Since when?”

“Since we were kids. Climbing roofs. Dreaming. Wishing.” Sienna looked at Beau. “That’s why it’s hard, Beau. You didn’t just takeusaway. You took an extra part of me too. I found a little of it again when Grace was born. It’s special, but it’s still different.”

Beau balled his fingers. It would be too easy for him to just reach out and hug Sienna, to pull her into his lap. He could give her a thousand apologies. But that wouldn’t change the look on her face, which was just so sad it made his heart hurt. If he was going to replace it with a smile—one that spread ear to ear and lit up her eyes—actions were needed, not words.

But Beau said and did nothing when Sienna rose from the bed.

“I need to get going. I have to shower and do a few things before Grace gets home from school. Want me to help you take those downstairs?” She pointed to the boxes.

“I’ve got it. Thanks.”

Beau followed Sienna as she walked out of the room. He paused in the doorway, watching as she made her way down the hall, his gut twisting tighter with every step she took farther from him. As Beau imagined what it would be like when Sienna reached the stairs and finally the front door, the nervous knot in his stomach traveled to his chest, squeezing his heart. It was hard enough forhimto be the one who left. But watching Sienna walk away was excruciating.

This is how she felt, he imagined, and a fresh wave of guilt swept over his body, but Beau wouldn’t let it drown him.

“Sienna,” he called out, and just as her hand reached the banister, she turned, waiting for him to continue. Beau bit his lip nervously, pocketing his hands before spitting out, “I’m going to take you on that date you always wished we went on.”

Sienna’s head jolted back. “You’re what?”

“Back then, when I could barely afford shit to throw in a picnic basket. You wanted to get dressed up, eat a five-course meal. You wished you felt like a princess. I’m going to make you feel like a princess.”

“I was joking. And I was seventeen,” she said, rolling her eyes.

“Exactly. I want you to be seventeen with me again. I want to havefunwith you again.”

“What are you talking about?”

“I’m talking about being that guy you once said made all your wishes come true.”

Sienna shook her head. “Did you not hear yourself before about living someone else’s dreams?”

Beau laughed.

“What’s so funny?”

“You don’t get it by now, do you?” he asked.

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