Page 156 of Tides That Bind

Harper lets go of my shoulders and I hear the cling of the scissors as she drops them against the vanity. She touches me again, but this time it’s her hands on my face, her legs on mine as she straddles them.

“I’m sorry I ever made you feel like you had to.” Harper gently pushes back my hair, clearing my face and leaves a small kiss on my lips.

The confidence I’ve built up over the last few days has begun to wane in the final hours and it’s awful to have to sit uncomfortably in my own insecurities.

A dog. Everyone will think you’re a joke, I tell myself.The judge will already make a ruling before I even open my mouth.

“Riley.”

It’s Harper’s voice and warmth that leads me out of a dark place, and suddenly I’m back to when I told her about this crazy idea, back to the day she told me she believed in me.

“Riley.”

I lean my forehead to hers. “I just want to be…something.”

Her hands find my face and she pushes gently to allow a little space between us. At first, I don’t want it. I want to keep leaning into Harper’s warmth, the steadiness of her breathing in hopes it regulates my own. But I know, the moment our eyes meet, she wants me to not just hear her, but see her too.

“Riley,” Harper begins. “Youareimportant. And brilliant. And all the things everyone who never really knew you said you weren’t. Tomorrow won’t change one bit of that.”

What Harper is saying is even if my efforts go unrewarded in bringing Tides home, she’ll still be there.

I close the space, wrapping her in a hug. “Thank you,” I whisper, my hands running up and down her back, touching the silky, untangled ends of her hair.

I pull back.

“Will you still shave my head?”

Harper playfully smacks me in the chest. “No. But I’ll trimthe ends so it’s more manageable. Don’t blame me if it’s a little uneven though.”

Sliding off my lap, Harper returns behind the chair, taking the scissors with her. I don’t say anything as she works, but my breathing levels when it returns to a length and weight that feels slightly more manageable on top of everything else I hold on my shoulders.

“I want you to know something,” Harper whispers. She stares at me through the mirror, running her fingers through my hair. “I love you from head to toe.”

My heart skips a beat when Harper bends forward, wrapping her arms around my neck and kisses my cheek.

I lean into her, turning to find her lips. “I love you too.”

We stay like that for a minute. I think I need it more than her. Or maybe that was before. Right now, all I can focus on is her sayingI love you. I don’t even know what I came in here for in the first place.

Eventually, she straightens. “Can I wash you?” she asks, her eyes holding mine in the mirror again.

I nod and Harper bends down, carefully collecting the bag she’s placed on the ground, folding it into a tight ball and throwing it in the trash before she moves to the shower, turning it on.

I slip off my pants at the door of the shower while Harper grabs me a clean towel from the closet.

My free hand tugs on the bottom of her tank top. “Take this off,” I say. “And wash me.”

The small, but powerful breath Harper lets out releases her lip and I step into the shower, right under the steam. My muscles ache from all the work earlier today on the beach, but it’s the best kind of sore, the one that makes you feel like you did something, like you’re accomplished.

That’s exactly how Harper makes me feel—accomplished.

“Lean back a little more,” she says from behind me.

My neck stretches backward and I groan when Harper’shands wind themselves through my hair, soaping it up as her nails lightly scratch at my scalp. Her smooth, bare, knee bumps my leg.

I reach back, finding her hips and pull her snug against me, gripping her flesh harder, adding even more pressure when the massaging of my scalp makes me moan. It’s nearly erotic to be touched like this. Because Harper physically caring for my one character trait I’ve been ridiculed for makes my entire body bloom from the acceptance.

She wantsme, as I am. Flaws, long hair, and all. To be wanted so completely is a desire I’ve never had the luxury of experiencing.