Page 130 of The Americana Playbook

“It’s,” I say. “I meantit’s.”

It’s me. I’m the fucking it.

I point at her name tag. “It says?—"

“I know what it says, Fitz. Why don’t you let me take a stab at your tattoo and see if I can read that too?”

I take a step back, having to lean against the table.

Parker places her purse and my jacket on a metal stool. “Yes,” she says. “I know about the tattoo. So that means I know you’ve been lying to me thisentiretime.”

I run my tongue along the inside of my bottom lip to buy a second. “I told you?—”

“I’d be really concerned if you went around tattoo-ing secrets you share with all yourcrushesif I were you.”

“Don’t change the subject, Parker,” I snap defensively. “You were being inappropriate and immature.”

“This means a lot coming from someone who can’t even address how hefeelsabout me. Stop pretending like this is about Camden, Fitz.”

I straighten, pushing off the table. “Yes, it’s about you talking withCamden,” I say mockingly, wiggling my fingers. “Have you forgotten that’s the guy your parents wanted to set you up with?”

“You brought me here! And we were talking…” Parker squeezes her eyes shut. “You know what? I don’t have to explain myself to you. I did nothing wrong, and you’re acting like a possessive jackass!”

I whip out my phone. “Possessive jackass? I’ll show you possessive jackass.”

“What are you doing?” she asks.

“Texting my accountant to make a donation to the guy Cam is running against.”

“Do you even know who he’s running against?”

I throw my hands up. “What difference does it make?”

She pulls down my arm holding the phone. “Would youstop?”

“What help did you need from him?” I challenge because this is where Parker is wrong. It’s not about hertalkingwith him. It’swhatthey’re talking about. “Go on, tell me. And don’t even mention the wordcampaign.”

Parker looks away.

An uncomfortable laugh slips out of me. “This is what I’m talking about. You’re my wife. If you need something, you come to me. There’s no one in this world who will take care of you like I can. There’s…”

“There’s what?”

There’s no one in this world who will love you better than me.

I toss the thought to the side. “I’ve been taking care of you this entire time, and you just repay me by building that damn wall higher.” I kick the stool next to me, and Parker jumps.

“Stop pretending I’m the only one with secrets here, Fitz.”

“That’s what you don’t get.” I dip to get closer to her eye level. “Everything I’m doing foryouis because of my secret, alright?”

Parker’s eyes widen.

“Memarryingyou? That’s because of my secret. That’s because it’s been a lifelong dream of mine. Are you happy now?” I lift my arms and drop them down. “Is this how you needed to hear it? Fine. I love you. I’m in love with you in a way that makes me”—I ball my hands, lifting and shaking them—“out of my mind. I’d do anything for you. I want to give you the world. And that’s not money. It’s not a house or an apartment or a horse. Loving someone means taking away their worries. Andfuck,Parker, you won’tletme.”

Parker’s mouth slowly falls open before she looks off to the side. “Well, since we’re being honest, that night after the engagement party, I messed everything up.”

Knowing where this is going, I clench my teeth and growl, “Don’t.”

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