Page 4 of Guardian

“You were married, so you must have had some romance in there, right?”

A tear falls off her cheek, but she catches it quickly.

I want to run to her. I want to comfort her. My entire body is aching.

“We met young. There was a little romance back then, but it stopped when we moved in together. I was only eighteen, so… I don’t know. We neglected simple stuff. And look, I don’t need a lot of date nights or romantic gestures, but it would’ve been nice if he liked kissing me or if sex didn’t feel like this pre-planned chore. Also, not screaming at me would’ve been nice too.”

There are so many parts of what she said that I want to rage over, but I get stuck on one in particular. “What the fuck? He didn’t like kissin’ you?”

More tears fall from her face, and I can’t be this far away from her any longer. I stand from the chair and drag it to her side of the table, landing my hand on her leg in comfort.

She glances at me quickly. I half expect her to push me away, but she doesn’t. I think she might like the relief. “He said he didn’t like kissing.”

I glint down at her lips before meeting her honey gaze. How could anyone not like kissing those lips? If she were mine, I’d kiss them every chance I got.

“The worst part was the communicating, though. He’s very easily offended, so talking about my feelings became a landmine. I’d think I was sharing something simple, but to him it sounded like something else.” She shrugs. “I don’t know… it always ended in tons of blame shifting and a screaming match. It was exhausting, and there wasn’t a lot of good to offset any of it. I have no idea why he came looking for me to get back together. Last I’d heard, he was sleeping with some twenty-something, which has been a real bright spot in my self-esteem,” she says, her tone sarcastic. “He never seemed interested in younger women before, but maybe he was never into me, which is fine, but it’s also weird that I spent so long with someone and they were meeting so few ofmyneeds.”

“Sounds like a selfish asshole.” I keep my hand steady on her thigh, unsure of the right thing to say.

“I know. I just don’t know how I spent so many years with him. I mean, this isn’t how I saw my life going.”

“I get it. I’ve been thinking the same lately.”

“What do you mean? You said you were married before, right?”

“Long time ago. Married straight out of high school, ended seven years later. We weren’t bad people, we were just different, and not in the good way. We couldn’t agree on anything. She hated that I was a cop, and I hated that she hated it. I worked my whole life to be respected, and she had something to say about my job every fuckin’ day. It got old fast. After that ended, I tried the blind date thing a few times, but it didn’t work out, and I’m fine with that. Some days, I think I’m better on my own, anyway. Not everyone was meant for marriage.”

She lands her soft hand on top of mine and she brushes her thumb back and forth. “Don’t trust anyone and you won’t get hurt. I get it. I’m sorry you’ve been stuck there for so long. Police work is respectable. I can imagine it’s hard when someone you love doesn’t see it the same way, but… you really don’t think you’re ready for marriage? You seem like a really great guy.”

I don’t know how she did it, but the validation is hitting me unusually hard. Maybe it’s because I’ve waited fifty years to hear it, or maybe it’s the fact that it’s come so easy to a woman I’ve just met where it hasn’t for anyone else.

Jesus. I need to get my head out of my ass. I can’t get sucked into this.

I drag in a deep breath and let it out slowly, inadvertently squeezing her thigh as I try to figure what profound thing I can say back. “You’re good at this.”That wasn’t the profound thing I was looking for.

A soft smile lifts her cheeks. “Seriously, I think maybe you just haven’t found the right person.” She clears her throat and sips her tea. “What happened with your ex? Must be hard to avoid her in a small town like this.”

“She moved to New York, met a guy in finance, so no running into any ghosts… thankfully. There’s still hope that your ex disappears.”

She laughs. “Now you sound like a villain. Are you going to offer to make him disappear next?”

“It was on the tip of my tongue.” I love watching her smile. “I was a cop long enough to know how to get away with all kinds of shit.”

“Wow,” she grins wider, “I feel so much safer now.”

“Promise I’ll only use my powers for good, though more times than not these days they’re used exclusively for finding the best pastries in town.” I take a sip of coffee and lean back in the small chair, aching to wrap my arms around her shoulders and pull her close, kiss her lips, taste her tongue.

“Well, you did spend the last thirty minutes listening to my feelings, so I’ll give you points for that.” She glances at her phone. “I’m actually having a really great time, and I hate to leave, but I promised Mrs. Robinson I’d stop by and say hi at noon. It’s sort of a standing date after my hikes.”

“No shit? I stop by there every other Monday morning for muffins and coffee. Been doing it for years now. If something’s going on in town, she knows it. It was a great way to stay on top of all the drama in town when I was on active duty. Now, I just go for the gossip, the company,” I grin, “and the muffins. You ever have her pumpkin ones?”

She shakes her head. “No, but I’ve had her pumpkin cookies and they’re insane! She makes this cream cheese glaze that’s, ugh, so good!”

“Are you guys close?”

Rocky growls low as he sleeps beneath the table.

“Yeah, she’s so amazing. I met her a while back, but we’ve gotten a lot closer since I started volunteering to finish the playground project. She held me up while I was going through my divorce. I can’t be thankful enough, really.” She stands and turns to the side, inadvertently showing off her bubbled ass before wrapping her purse around her shoulder. “It was good getting to know you, Boone. I’ve never met anyone quite as… interesting.”

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