Page 8 of You are the Reason

I nod and smile at her, walking towards the corner we call the lounge. It’s quieter over here, generally it’s filled with those who come to relax rather than dance or drink at the bar itself. We try to cater for everyone. I pass the pool table and the jukebox that divides the dance floor and the lounge, noticing a girl sitting by herself, whom Becky has asked me to serve.

“Hey girl, what can I —”

A pair of deep green eyes meet mine.

“Kinsley? You work here?” The girl interrupts me, jumping up and pulling me in for a hug.

“Sophie?” I say surprised, “Uh yeah, I do. Are you here by yourself?” I glance around looking for any others that she might be here with.

“Nope,” she says, popping the p, with a twinkle in her eye. “I’m supposed to be meeting someone, he’s yet to show though … Do you think you could grab me a shot of vodka for the nerves and something ‘girly’ to drink?”

I laugh, “Yes, of course I can, I’ll be right back.”

It’s only the second time I’m seeing this girl, and already I feel as though I could sit in her company for hours. Guilt nips at me for the way I ran out on her at our initial meeting; a strange want to explain myself to her. I sigh, rubbing the back of my neck. The secrets I’ve been carrying all these years weigh heavy; I can’t explain myself to her, not yet. Returning with a shot of vodka and a cocktail – thankful that Brad whipped something up at my request of a ‘girly’ drink – I see she’s still alone. Glancing over the bar, everyone is pretty settled and I nod to Becky letting her know I’m taking a break.

“One second, don’t touch that shot,” I tell her as I place my tray on her table. I weave through girls on the dance floor and duck behind the bar, pouring another shot. Brad chuckles under his breath but doesn’t say a word. I have a feeling Becky and him might be an item, and she may have informed him that I’mboss ladyas she likes to call me.

“Bottoms up.” I wink at Sophie as we take our shots.

“Eww, that was —”

“Something to shake the nerves?” I finish for her and we both fall into the couch laughing. She checks her phone and sighs. I can tell by the defeated look on her face that her date has stood her up. My heart aches for her. Jesse will never believe me when I tell him, but for the first time in my life I’m going to put myself out there. Sophie seems to need someone to keep her company tonight and there aren’t any little voices telling me to run away. “What’s that cocktail like?”

She smirks and takes a sip. “Strong—” she coughs, “—but good.” She takes another. I wave Becky over and let her know that I’m calling my shift for the night, she eyes the shot glasses and makes me promise to stay put until she finishes so that she can drop me home.

“I’m going to get one for myself and grab my stuff from out the back, then we are going to show those girls how to dance.” Sophie offers me athank yousmile before I leave.

After our second cocktail I drag us off the dance floor back to the couches in the corner. For the past hour and a half, we have danced to all our favourite throwback songs on the jukebox and we are well and truly the last ones here.

Leaning over and plucking Sophie’s phone from her hands, I take a drunken selfie, add myself as a contact and attach the photo.

“Won’t let you be the one that got away.” I throw the romantic reference in to soften the blow that her date stood her up tonight. I can’t help but notice a text message pop up before handing her phone back to her.

Zach - Something came up. I’ll make it up to you.

Then it hits me. “I’ve got it!” I yell over the music. “The most perfect guy for you!”

“Nooo.” She shakes her head. “No more guys, no more dates.”

“But he’s honestly perfect,” I stumble over my words, my mind thinking about Jesse “— he even has a dog!” I say, interrupting my thoughts. I need to make a mental note to go visit Lou-loo soon. Hopefully, I’ll remember this mental note tomorrow once I’ve sobered up. What girl can refuse a cute guy and a dog?

“We could even double date,” I say, focusing back on the conversation. I’m not sure if she has said a word at all since I’ve been off in my thoughts.

Her response tells me she also has been off in her thoughts, “I’m so glad we met, I think I’m gonna keep you.”

* * *

It takes me longer than I would like to admit to unlock my door when Becky drops me off, we dropped Sophie off too. Neither of us in any shape to get ourselves home.

It shows as I hop from foot to foot and lean against the wall to get my heels off. After I stumble up the stairs, I glance towards my ensuite, the thought of having to get undressed, find the right water temperature, get wet and wash my body all to get dry again is far too complex for my brain right now, I can shower in the morning. When I collapse onto my bed, memories of simpler times consume my dreams …

With my headphones in and my iPod on shuffle, I dance around my bedroom. Drowning out the reality that I’m stuck at home on a Saturday night. A Saturday night which doubles as my birthday mind you. Mum doesn’t let me adventure out of the house other than to go to school, yet even though we are under the same roof we barely say two words to each other. She’s probably already drunk herself into a state of unconsciousness, glancing at my iPod the time is 9.05pm; yep she will be out by now, I should go turn the lights off and pop a blanket over her. I don’t blame her; for the drinking, or for anything for that matter. Her husband left for work one day and never returned, and then her son died two years later. Yeah, life’s been a little rough for us.

*clink* pause *clink*

I take my headphones out and listen for the noise again.

Another clink sounds, before it’s followed by a muffled “ah shit”

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