Page 28 of Trickster King

I adored Geoff’s wife, who took no nonsense from anyone, especially her husband. “Please thank her for coming out, and if she’s actually talking while driving, I’ll have you spank her later.”

Geoff pointed at the truck’s navigation system. “She’s using speaker, so never fear, plus she’s parked at the end of the driveway waiting for us to line up nice and neat. We will be an orderly convey.”

“She gets extra chicken tonight, assuming we have enough.”

Geoff relayed her reward, which won me his wife’s approval for at least a few hours. “There won’t be any problems on the chicken front. Senator Padrino went to your old haunts and cleaned out several stores to make sure you had enough of everything. The Tech Menace and his wife are coming with extra trailers, and they’re bringing their cattle transports as well. We should be able to have all the cattle moved by the time you’re done cooking dinner.”

Huh. “Remind me to set up an emergency transport volunteer group—something official if we get a natural disaster of some sort—so we can organize this equally fast or faster.”

“I’ll email you with a reminder for when you’re back at work.” Geoff informed his wife he loved her more, ordered her to drive carefully, and pulled one of Jessica’s tricks, hanging up before she could reply. “I’ll pay for that later, but she’ll be wondering what I’m up to the entire drive now rather than wondering if you’re going to crash your trailer.”

“Smart man. There is no way in hell I’m crashing a truck and trailer this expensive with my prized cattle on board. I know my stop distance by heart, and I will become excessively grouchy when idiots get into my braking distance.”

“The wise Texans won’t. The others… well, I doubt the truck will budge when you drive right over them. We do have to take care to prevent flipping the trailer, but this truck was built to last.”

“And to haul a ridiculous amount of weight.”

“Yes. Your wife is going to delight in this truck, I’m certain. Even more than you will.”

“Is it bad I’ve decided this one is mine?”

“I’m sure she’ll be satisfied with the two others you bought for this venture.”

I hoped so because I’d have a fight with my wife to keep it. “I bought it, I drove it first, and as such, it is mine.”

“You can’t add any extra children to the upcoming delivery, Your Majesty.”

I laughed at the well-aimed jab over what happened whenever I got into a dispute with my wife, especially over things like trucks and trailers. “She wants three more after the twins, Geoff. At least three more. I wish I could guarantee that could happen, but…”

“Menopause is an unfortunately common occurrence in older women.”

I snorted; if Jessica learned Geoff had called her older, it would end in two shockers facing off against each other. “I won’t tell her you said that, and you won’t tell her I agreed with you. Deal?”

“Deal.”

“The doctors are concerned she’s showing zero signs of menopause sweeping in yet,” I admitted. “She’s behind on the pre-menopause symptoms. But they’re basing their knowledge on women who have only had two or so children and had them early; we started late, and Jessica becomes rather irritated if she’s not expecting a new family member starting a few months after the last one. I made the mistake of trying to be a voice of reason once and exactly once. It turns out asking if she’s really sure is a bad, bad idea. Not recommended.”

“As it seems you survived, you were not killed by your wife for breaking one of the rules, so it’s fine,” Geoff replied, snickering.

I pulled into the line, put the truck into park and let the engine idle, and settled in to wait while the rest of the drivers got situated. “I bet the entire RPS is having a cow or two right now.”

“I will neither confirm nor deny the presence of RPS agents with the various wives who came along to help with the operation.”

I shrugged. “If I spot them, I’ll play dumb—or recruit them to find me more trailers along with bringing their wives along for the ride if they have them. Or husbands if some of the ladies decided to show us men how cattle should be moved.”

“There were inquiries on why you didn’t just do a proper cattle drive between the ranches.”

“Fungal infection,” I replied.

“We washed all the cattle down before loading them, and all were treated with antifungals as we were loading them up. But yes, we cited the fungal infection problem—and that you were still on your prescription. There was significant mourning. Now you’re to be pitied due to having lost a chance to properly ride the range.”

“I’m not going to just be riding the range, I’m going to be buying the whole damned thing. How are the sales going?”

“They’re going fine. We’ll have signed paperwork for your acquisitions tomorrow, and we’re cleared to go pick up your Akhal-Tekes tomorrow or the day after, depending on how long it takes us to get to their farm. We have a total headcount of horses.”

“Hit me with it.”

“They have twenty Akhal-Tekes. And unbeknownst to me, they have four different lines. They got two new horses about five years ago as foals who aren’t from the same lines as the others. I checked their lines between other work today, and you’re going to be really happy with them. The stud comes from a line believed to be dead. The registrar lost track of him after his sale and assumed he hadn’t made it since he hasn’t been bred yet.”