Page 17 of Scarred Heart

Rhiannon and Hannah were on the sofa with a big bowl of popcorn between them.Hannah gasped when she saw the finished product of all of my preparation.“Mom.I want to date you.”

Her sudden announcement made me burst out laughing, and my sister joined me.“So you like everything?The earrings are okay?”I touched my fingertips to the dangling diamond earrings I bought after signing my first client.I loved how they sparkled with every move I made, but I was starting to wonder if they were maybe a little too much.

I didn’t want Spencer to think I went overboard for him, even if I had.It had been forever since I went this far for a simple dinner.It was probably a waste of time, something I would regret once he inevitably said something painfully ignorant or completely stupid.

I wanted him to see what he was missing.If I couldn’t show him our daughter for obvious reasons, I would have to show myself off a little.Looking at her now, I knew he was missing out.Was she?Was I holding her back by hiding her from him?I was only trying to protect her from ending up like him.Would she understand one day?

“Perfect,” Rhiannon announced, giving me a thumbs-up.“He won’t know what to do with himself, whoever he is.”

“Your boyfriend,” Hannah teased in a singsong voice.

“I’m telling you, he’s not.Sorry to disappoint you.”We were supposed to meet at eight, and a glance at my phone told me the time was quickly approaching.I couldn’t stall any longer.

Why was I so freaked out?

Rhiannon popped up from the couch with a few last-minute questions, following me to the door while I looked through my clutch to be sure I wasn’t forgetting anything.“It’s a Saturday night, and she’s hanging out with you,” I concluded.“We can push bedtime to ten so long as you promise not to let her eat that entire bowl of popcorn beforehand.”

“Yes, ma’am,” my sister replied with a salute.“I’ll let her eat a whole package of Oreos instead.”

“You’re hilarious.”

“You’re nervous,” she retorted, laughing gently.“Fess up.Who is this guy?Why are you so freaked out?”

“I’m not freaked out.”

“Right.That’s why you’ve put more energy into getting ready for tonight than I’ve seen you put into anything for… I can’t even remember.”

“And maybe that’s a problem.But you know how it is.She’s more important,” I whispered, glancing at my oblivious daughter, who sat glued to her movie, mindlessly eating popcorn without looking into the bowl.If anything, it was a nice change from the tablet Mom and Dad had insisted on getting her for Christmas, even though I’d asked them not to.

“Hey, that’s what we’re here for,” Rhiannon reminded me.“It takes a village and all that, right?”

“Thank you.”I kissed her cheek, then rubbed a smudge of red lipstick off her skin.Cherries in the Snow, the same shade worn by generations of women on Mom’s side.We all shared the same fair complexion.

“So…” Rhiannon stopped me before I could leave, lifting an eyebrow.“Last question is, when can I expect you home?Or should I?”

“I’ll come home,” I promised.“I’m telling you, it’s not that kind of night.”

“Right.Just do me a favor and keep me updated if anything changes.”

“You are impossible.”I called out my goodbyes to Hannah one more time then ducked out, down to the elevator.My ride would be waiting downstairs any minute, and something told me I would need more than a drink or two if I wanted to get through this meal.Better to have someone do the driving for me.

This was crazy.If I ended up hurt, angry, or wanting to kill Spencer at any point, it would be nobody’s fault but my own.Why did I let him do this to me?What did it matter if he saw for himself what he had missed out on by taking the cowardly way out?It didn’t change anything.He had still chickened out and sent Daddy’s lawyer to do what he should have done himself.

He hadn’t known my real last name?Somebody sure as hell had because my true name was on that damn document.

No, he hadn’t tried hard enough to find me, was all.And now, afraid of what retaliation might look like for him, he wanted to smooth things over.Show me a good time, maybe get me a little drunk, make me remember the way things used to be.

Like I could forget.

Like a week had gone by without me thinking of him at least once as I looked at the baby we created, remembering those days together when anything had seemed possible.Then, the nights I had spent sitting up with Hannah, rocking her to sleep, wondering what life would be like if her daddy was still in the picture.There had been plenty of time to remember and regret.

I had to deliberately push all that off to the side, climbing out of the car in front of the West Hollywood restaurant.No doubt he chose someplace trendy and upscale to impress me.I wasn’t the same girl anymore, the one who practically creamed her panties over an exclusive dinner reservation or a flight to San Francisco on his family’s private jet.

That didn’t mean I was immune to the reaction.He was waiting for me, standing in front of the building, distracted by something on his phone.I had the chance to observe him without him knowing it.Did that soft grunt come from me?It must have because it paired so well with the sudden ache in my chest and the consuming heat in my core.

All of a sudden, I was hungry.Starving.And food had nothing to do with it.He was so damn handsome, unfairly so, with his slightly mussed blond hair looking like he had just run his hand through it, pushing it back from his tanned forehead.His sharp jaw was perfectly highlighted by the light from his phone, and the firm set of his full mouth told me he was deep in thought.Oh, that mouth of his.The things it used to do to me.

The things I could almost imagine it doing to me now, caught up in the grip of blind lust that only got worse when his gaze lifted.

---