Page 52 of Scarred Heart

I should’ve been celebrating.That motherfucker was going down.There was nothing standing in the way of our patent’s approval.We were about to usher in a new era, Miles and me.I should’ve called my friends to see if they would have a drink with me, maybe catch dinner.There was plenty to catch up on.

I couldn’t bring myself to do any of it.I didn’t have it in me to listen to ball-busting and guy talk, either.

I came so close to having everything I never knew I wanted or needed.Life would have been easier and simpler if I had never met my daughter.

I wouldn’t turn my back on her.That much I knew for sure.My lawyer had already reached out to Rowan, and as far as I knew, we were waiting for her to make a move when it came to discussing visitation.I wouldn’t demand custody and put Hannah through that.I was willing to settle for getting to know each other better for now.Of course, that meant telling her I was her father, but she would find out eventually.

I settled back on the sofa, staring at the ceiling.A king in his castle.What the fuck did it get me at a time like this when I couldn’t shake the feeling of losing something I never had?It was my stupid fault for caring as much as I did, letting myself get close to them.I hated that Hannah had to be any part of this, but then I wasn’t the one who decided to talk to the enemy.That was all on Rowan.

The worst part was none of it made a difference for Damian.Not in any positive way.He had dug his own grave by kicking the hornet’s nest, and Rowan had helped him do it.At least he was out of our way for good, even if it meant sacrificing…

Nothing.I had sacrificed nothing because I had nothing.She was a woman I fucked.Somebody I’d spent time with.It didn’t have to be anything more than that.I would move on like I had previously.We would sure as hell be busy once the patent was approved, and I had already taken the extra steps to have the application expedited.There would be more than enough to distract me.

But this wasn’t like before.There was no trip to China in my immediate future.I wasn’t trying to forget a terrible mistake and the fallout that resulted.I couldn’t talk myself into forgetting the very real feelings that had bloomed in me and were now withered.

I was tempted to ignore my phone when it rang.Anyone who needed me at nine on a Monday night could wait.The ringing stopped, and I closed my eyes, soaking in the silence until it rang again.Blowing out a sigh, I sat up and looked down at where the phone sat on the table.

Hannah.

I picked up without thinking, at least a dozen ugly scenarios racing through my head in the time it took me to answer the call and say, “Hello?”

“Hi,” she said.“Um… you told me I could call whenever I wanted.”

The sound of her voice turned my throat into a pinhole.I barely sucked in a breath at first, but I was able to reply, “Yes, of course.I’m glad you called.How are you?Wait.It’s a school night.You’re up pretty late.”

“I know, I know.I couldn’t sleep.”

“Why not?”I asked.“Something bothering you?”

“Yeah, actually.”She sounded nervous, poor kid.“I just wanted to ask if you’re still mad at Mom.”

She may as well have punched me.“Did she ask you to call?”I asked, suspicious.

“Oh no!”The way she said it told me it was the truth.“She would kill me if she knew I called you.Please, please don’t tell her.She would never let me use the phone again.”

A little dramatic, but somehow, I believed her.“Who said I’m mad at your mom?”

Her heavy sigh was enough to make me grin despite the situation.“Why does everybody always treat me like a baby?I’m not stupid.I can see things.I hear things.Jeez.Like…”

I waited a beat before prompting.“Like what?”

“I wasn’t supposed to tell you I know this, but… I know you’re my dad.I figured it out,” she blurted out a second later.“I mean, you’re like the only guy Mom has ever introduced me to that she was, like, dating or whatever.And you were so nice to me.And we kind of look alike,” she added.

It was out.She didn’t sound disappointed, which I took as a good sign.“But your mom told you to pretend you didn’t know?”

“She said it would be nicer if you told me yourself.But this is an emergency.So I didn’t want to wait.”

The use of the word emergency made the hair rise on the back of my neck.“What’s happening?You can tell me.”

“Okay, don’t get mad at me or anything, and maybe don’t tell Mom…”

“Hannah…” I sighed.

“Last night, she was fighting with Aunt Ree out on the front porch at Grandmom and Granddad’s house.I wasn’t supposed to be listening, but I couldn’t help it.”

I was torn between wanting to chide her the way I knew I should have and demanding to hear more.“I’ll overlook that for now.”

“Aunt Ree did something bad,” she whispered.“Mom was really mad at her.Something about a guy she was going out with and how he tricked her.Aunt Ree told him stuff she wasn’t supposed to.Like that, you’re my dad.Something about an accident.That was all I could hear, really.Grandmom came in, and I had to pretend I wasn’t listening…” She paused, adding, “Then Mom cried all night.She was supposed to go back to her apartment after dinner, but she stayed here instead and went home this morning.She was too upset last night.”

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