Page 26 of Shenanigans

More cock-a-doodle-doos rang out.

“Make them stop and I’ll drop the assault charge,” Dutch promised.

I snorted. “Right.”

“You have my word.”

I pulled my eyes off his crotch. “And why should I believe you?”

“I was a Boy Scout.”

Like I believed that, but the crowing was making my head throb. “Fine.” I reached out psychically.“Stop crowing.”

The chickens fell silent.

Dutch rubbed the back of his neck. “And the dogs, please.”

I sent out another psychic command. The dogs stopped barking. “Better?”

“Yes. Thank you.” Dutch started back to his house and paused at the end of the walkway. “The next time you have pigeons shit on my truck, you’re cleaning it off.”

“Stop being a dickhead and it won’t be a problem.”

“My office. Eight o’clock sharp.” He disappeared into the darkness.

“Jerk.” I closed the window.

Arf. Arf.

I burst out laughing.“Putting a skunk in his truck is an excellent idea, but since he knows what I can do, we’d have to make a run for the border.”

Chapter Nine

Dutch’s office was a chaotic mess. My gaze roved over the piles of paper covering his desk to the fast food containers spilling from the trash can to the wanted posters and bloody crime scene photos plastered all over the walls. Did he have hoarder tendencies or was he just a slob? I eyed the ketchup splattered computer screen. Slob. “Charming décor.”

Dutch rumbled from behind me. “It’s the maid’s day off.”

I glanced over my shoulder and my jaw dropped. Whoa! Dutch was wearing a sharp, black business suit and his beard was gone.

“I have court today.” He explained as he ushered me into his office.

“Oh.” I studied Dutch’s colorfully bruised face. “Did the security guards give you that shiner?”

Dutch removed a gym bag and ballistic vest from the chair beside his desk. “Cut the innocent act. You know damn well how I got these bruises.”

“Right. The mysterious Ninja Nun kicked your butt,” I responded.

“You’re a real riot.” Dutch pointed at the chair and ordered, “Sit.”

“I’m not a dog. I don’t fetch, heel or roll over on command.”

“Do you do everything the hard way?”

I countered, “Are you always an ass?”

“Please, sit,” Dutch said, his teeth bared in the semblance of a smile.

I sat. “See? Being polite works so much better.”

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