Page 72 of Pucking Grey

“What?” Ryan scoffs, looking at Crew. Crew nods at him.

I stand near the edge of the couch, feeling the heat of Ryan’s stare. It’s so similar to my dad’s intense gaze that I could fizzle away. “Can you not make this a thing?”

Ryan sits up too, clearly upset. “But it is a thing.”

I scoff. “It’s not a thing until you make it a thing, and I don’t want it to be a thing.”

Ryan says, “Okay. I won’t make it a thing.”

“Promise?” I beg, imagining what would happen if I gave Ryan the green light to handle it however he decides.

“I promise, Mads.”

“Thank you. They’re both coming tonight, so I don’t want this to be really awkward.”

He nods understanding. “I might have a talk with them, but I won’t make it awkward. Zero awkwardness.”

I point at him. “You are not talking to them! Not unless I give you the okay. Ryan!” I look over at Baddie Addie. “Addison,” I plead. “Back me up.”

She nods, looking at Ryan. “Don’t intervene. Maddie is a grown woman. She can handle it.”

He’s reluctant to agree, but he nods. “Okay, but you need to break up with Grey. Promise me that you’re going to.”

I inhale, glancing at Sydney. I can’t believe I’m even considering doing what I’m about to do. I’m going to tell them my biggest secret. Maybe it’s for the best. I sigh. “What I’m about to say needs to stay between the five of us.”

We all look around at each other and nod in agreement.

Ryan asks, “What is it?”

“You guys can’t hate Greyson,” I mumble.

Crew interrupts. “Maddie, I saw him upstairs with Poppy last night.”

“I know.” I sigh, shaking. “I know what you saw, but the thing is that Grey and I aren’t really together.”

“What?” Crew and Ryan say at the same time. I look at Sydney who is nodding at me with encouragement. She knows how close we all are. This isn’t a secret I can keep anymore, not when they’re hating Grey for being Grey.

“Yeah,” I mutter. “Look, I didn’t like Greyson before all this. I really hated him, actually. Like every time I saw him, I would ignore him like he didn’t exist. Everything about him, how he slept around, how he skated on the ice. I saw him eating a meatball sandwich one time, and it disgusted me. I used to criticize him on the ice, and I swore up and down that Matt was a better player. But I was harsh and judgmental. Matt hated him, so I did, too. Which is so stupid. And so when Matt cheated on me or whatever. Gosh, you know, he’s claiming he didn’t cheat on me? He said it happened before we got together, but I realized that I don’t want to be with him anymore so that minor detail doesn’t matter. So, the only way to keep Matt away from me was to jump into a relationship with someone else. So, on a raging impulse, I walked up to Greyson Cress and – someone give me a drumroll or something.”

Addison starts tapping the kitchen counter.

“I begged him to be my fake boyfriend.” I throw my hands and then shrug. She stops the drumroll and only the hockey game in the back fills the silence as Crew and Ryan gawk at me. I continue, “Grey absolutely refused, and I mean he did not want to do it. I was fairly offended by that actually. My stomach turns just thinking about how much he’s rejected me. Matt tried to get me back, and I’ve been living with Grey as repellent for Matt because honestly, I want absolutely nothing to do with Matt anymore. And on top of all of this, I think Grey is actually a nice guy. He’s sweet to me.” I put out my hands in defense. “We haven’t done a single thing, except kiss, but I initiated it because I wanted to piss Matt off. And the problem is that it was the hottest kiss of my life, and I can’t stop thinking about it. And I thought I could have this weekend to clear my head, but then my big brother had to intimidate Grey, and then you invite him to this party where I’m supposed to clear my head. So now I don’t get to do that. Not after what Crew saw last night. And oh my god, I’m rambling so much and not making any sense, but this is why I need this to stay between us. I don’t even know what’s going on anymore. I think all I care about now is Grey.” I shake my head. Fucking Greyson Cress. He’s all I care about now.

And I am freaking panting under all their stares. I start pacing in front of the couch.

Sydney saves the silence by saying, “Yeah, and I’m guilty too because I encouraged all of this. I knew that Matt hated Grey, so I may have pushed her to ask him. We couldn’t think of any other way to keep Matt away.”

Crew is staring at me in surprise. “Why not just tell the guy to leave you alone?”

I stop pacing to stare at him. “I did. Do you think that worked? It would’ve been great if it did, and now I’ve got myself into this whole mess. And it’s not really a mess because it’s quite simple, but in here.” I point to my head and heart. “I am a mess!”

Sydney says, “But being with Grey has really helped. He’s a Matt repellent, for sure.”

Ryan doesn’t seem surprised at all – it’s like this was the missing puzzle piece.

I glance at Crew. “So, if you think that I care about Grey hooking up with Poppy last night, I only care in the slightest. But Grey has been helping me this entire time. He’s my friend. And that’s why I’m trying to tell you guys that he’s not as bad as any of you think. He helped me make Matt jealous and he’s keeping Matt away from me.”

Ryan and Crew exchange glances. So, I look at Sydney and Addison in confusion.

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