He catches me eyeing his remaining erection and grins. “Ah. You don’t have to get me off to please me. Honestly, I forgot to tell you I have a kink about forcing myself to wait to get off until I can’t stand it, for one. And, second, I would take care of that myself, not make you do it - unless we happened to be in the mood together. But, third, I really did get spoiled. I told you the affection I like most is watching you unravel.”
Shuffling in place, I burn hot. Truthfully, I want to unravel more. Especially if it means I get to watch Remington unravel on top of me too.
But his eyes widen. “That’s right– What did you mean outside your door? You were worried you didn’t do the right thing, as in when we were making out downstairs, or something else?”
“Y-yes, I– It was that, and leaving you frustrated. I haven’t seen men have a lot of patience before. I normally just lay down for them, and they come in me and leave. I don’t know if I’m good at this stuff compared to you.”
Rapid emotions flicker across Remington’s face. But when he settles on an intense frown, my chest burns with anxiety. “Are you telling me a guy’s never made you orgasm before?”
I bite my lip, dropping my head. Fidgeting with the skin on the back of my knuckles, I lower my voice. “I-I don’t know, not on purpose, I don’t think. I get so nervous that it feels impossible. One time, a guy got me close, but it was taking a while, so I just pretended it happened so we could stop because he looked really bored and frustrated with me.”
Remington’s jaw tightens. “So, do you get nervous, or is it actually that no one took the time for you to feel safe enough with them?”
My heart flips. I never thought of it that way.
He sighs, gripping his forehead. “God, that hurt my heart. Before we get to anything too intense, I think you need some good vanilla sex, L.L.B. You’re capable of feeling pleasure, and you deserve it.”
I drop my head, willing away fresh tears. But Remington strides around the bed, hurriedly enveloping me in his embrace. I nuzzle into his chest, hiding my face.
Remington kisses the top of my head. “Come here, baby. Let’s lay down and cuddle for a while.”
That sounds amazing, so I hurriedly pull away, crawling onto my bed. Remington chuckles behind me. His weight pressing into the mattress beside me for the first time flips my heart. He helps me remove my stifling jacket, stripping his right after. My heartbeat pulses into my throat, unsure how much more we’ll see of each other.
But Remington lays down in his T-shirt and pants, opening his arms wide. The second I return to his embrace, every ounce of anxiety melts away, aided by his gentle touch sweeping my bare upper back.
“Does that feel good?” He whispers.
I nod, my eyelids drooping.
“Close your eyes. I’ll give you a little massage.”
The second he runs gentle pressure between my shoulder blades, I can’t keep my eyes open. Giving Remington a soft hum, I’m delighted by the sound of his warm breath; I can hear the breezy smile in it.
But after Remington melts me into my mattress, I open my eyes with a gasp. “Can I trace your tattoos again?”
“You look so sleepy, baby girl. It’s okay for you to enjoy yourself.”
“I am, with you. But do you not want me to take care of you ever too? It matters to me that you also feel good and safe.”
He grows quiet. “Sorry. I might just want to cuddle together for a while then.”
Settling into him, I bite my lip. “Sorry if I said that meanly.”
“No, you were sweet. I just need to absorb what you said. It’s been a long time since I’ve heard something like that from anyone other than my best friends.”
The thought of Remington not receiving enough love kills me. I gaze at him, breathing through the raw ache in my heart. “I want you to hear it.”
He’s silent for a while again. When he speaks, his whisper is quieter than ever. “Thank you.”
I decide to trace his smoky, spiraling neck tattoos on my own. As my fingertips roam over each flickering stripe of ink, Remington’s blinks deepen.
But our eyes remain on each other. Our rhythmic breaths link in perfect time, creating a quiet, peaceful softness between each inhale and exhale. A coziness unlike anything I’ve ever experienced settles in my heart; it might be the first time I’ve truly felt everything is okay in my world.
Soon enough, Remington copies me by tracing my features. He skates around my eyebrows, down my nose, and over my sensitive lips, leaving behind tingles that make me shudder. Breaking into a smile, Remington hums.
“I don’t want to sleep,” he whispers.
I smile, huddling in closer. “Me neither. I just want to lay here all night, living in the moment with you.”