Page 45 of The Cult

Did something happen while I was in the box? I don’t remember anything after I walked in. No, that’s not true. I remember the smell of piss surrounding me. Harker really needs to step up his efforts at keeping the box clean. He has time, I’m sure. It’s not like there’s someone in the box every minute of the day and night.

The curious way this woman is looking at me says something happened to me in there, though. I could ask again, but it would be no use. She’s a follower. She does as she’s told, and she’s clearly been instructed not to talk to me about what went on with me inside the box.

As I try to reconstruct the two hours I was in there, she finishes her task and steps back away from me. “All done. Have a day full of light and goodness, Nash.”

I give her a forced smile since I don’t know her name and watch her walk out of the room. When she closes the door, I swing my legs off the bed and sit up to get a better look at where I am. The walls are painted a pale yellow, and the floor is that oak hardwood Micah likes. Three pictures of sunsets in gold frames hang along the wall directly in front of me, and on the table near the door a picture of the farm as it must have looked before Micah brought us all here sits in a similar gold frame.

This place is definitely nicer than anywhere else members of The Golden Light sleep. Why did Micah have me brought here, though? Why not just have me taken back to my room?

I stand up, but my legs give out and I fall back onto the bed. Reaching down, I grab the towel to cover myself in case one of the women comes back. I can’t imagine why I don’t have enough strength in my legs to stand up. I haven’t been doing anything strenuous enough to make them weak, so what’s happening?

For a few moments, I try to collect my thoughts, but it’s as if my brain stopped working when I entered the box. I can’t recall anything after Harker closed the door and I was trapped in pure darkness.

What happened for the next two hours? And how long have I been in this room?

I try to stand again but far more slowly, and I’m more successful this second time. I still feel weak, but I’m able to keep on my feet. After wrapping the towel around my body, I pad over to the window, noting how the floor here isn’t filled with splinters I’ll have to yank out later.

When I pull back the white curtains, I see it’s daylight. Quickly, I do the math and figure out there are at least five hours I can’t account for between when I would have finished my time in the box and now. Have I been in this room for all that time?

“Good to see you’re up and around.”

I spin around to see Micah standing in the doorway, and the first thing I notice is he’s wearing a shirt. He never wears a shirt. Why is he wearing one now?

He steps into the room and my eyes are drawn to his feet. He’s got shoes on. What the hell is going on? A shirt and shoes?

“Yeah, I guess. I’m a little confused about things, to be honest. Like how did I get here? And how long have I been in this room?”

He holds his hand up and gives me one of his smiles that’s meant to say, “It’s okay, my child.” Normally, that works, but losing at least five hours of my life has me a little freaked out right now.

“Micah, I need to know what happened to me. That woman wouldn’t tell me, but then again, that’s not surprising since I’m sure she’s doped up to high heaven. I need you to tell me what happened in the box that warrants me getting all this special attention.”

His smile never fades, even though I’m very much out of line with all my questions I’m demanding to have answered. Walking over to me, he nods his head and answers, “You had a bit of a breakdown in there. Yes, I think that would be the correct word for it. Now let’s sit down and we can talk about it.”

Sit down and talk about it? Why does he sound like some shrink?

I do as he says and take a seat on the bed. He sits at the nearby desk and leans forward to set his elbows on his knees. At any moment, I expect him to start giving me a pep talk like he’s a coach and it’s halftime in the big game.

Except there are no other players.

“So how do you feel now?” Micah asks in that social worker kind of voice like I need to be handled with kid gloves.

“I feel confused and would like some answers as to what happened to me. I’m sorry if I’m overstepping my boundaries. I truly am. You know me, Micah. I wouldn’t do this if I wasn’t really in need of some answers to clarify what is going on here.”

His smile grows as I finish speaking, and he says, “What’s going on here is what’s always been going on. I care about how you’re doing, Nash. I hope you know that. I hope you believe it.”

As much as I want to find out what happened in those five lost hours and while I was in the box, I see he’s trying to be nice, so I take a deep breath to calm down. As my father used to say, you catch more flies with honey than vinegar.

“I do, and I believe with all my heart that you care about all of us here, Micah. I love being part of The Golden Light. It’s my home, and I care about you and all my fellow believers. I just want to know what happened to me in the box and for the five hours after that I can’t remember.”

For the first time since he walked into this room, his smile fades just a little but enough that the worry in his eyes becomes obvious. “You didn’t handle the box as well as you have before, Nash. Things got a little wild, but not to worry. You’re fine now. I made sure of that.”

“You mean with the women giving me a sponge bath? It was nice, I guess, but I need to know what happened in the box because I can’t remember. And what happened in the five hours afterward? Please, Micah. I need some answers.”

Once more, he gives me a big smile, but now I know to pay attention to the look in his eyes, and they’re still full of concern. But for what or who? Me? Did something terrible happen to me in the box? Did I do something?

“Of course, you do. Maybe you should eat something, though, first. You must be hungry.”

His dodging my questions frustrates me, so I jump up off the bed, shaking my head. “I don’t want to eat! I want to know what happened to me in the box and then where those five hours went.”