Page 24 of Sun Elves of Ardani

He looked up at her, his eyes narrowing. He had never known her to be a liar. It was one of the things he liked most about her. Her feelings were always transparent. She wore her emotions freely on her face, and she wasn’t shy about sharing her opinions. It never seemed to occur to her to be deceptive.

That had been jarring when he’d first spent time among Ardanians, back in Kuda Varai. People like Kadaki and Novikke didn’t behave like people in Ysura did. They didn’t play political games with their peers or connive and scheme to climb social ladders. They didn’t see other people merely as potential competition or as resources to be utilized. They were trusting, and they could be trusted in turn.

At first, he had thought it was because they were too stupid to realize they were putting themselves at a disadvantage by being so unguarded with their intentions. Later, he had realized they were just kindhearted. Some might have seen that as equivalent to stupidity. He had found it surprising and endearing.

But now, she lied to him.

“You insult my intelligence,” he said. There was a faint rattle in his lungs, but it cleared away after he coughed. “I am relieved you don’t want me dead, though I wonder why you want me to be crippled and in pain. Is it just because you enjoy watching me suffer? Or is there something else?”

Her eyebrows dropped low over her eyes. “I’m telling you, it’s not in my power to do any more.”

“You’re a liar.”

“You think that I would refrain from healing someone if it were within my abilities to do so? I swore a medic’s oath when I joined the army.”

“Does this oath require you to heal enemies?”

“It does, actually, not that I’d need an oath to force me to do that.”

“I know how skilled a healer you are, Kadaki. I know what you’re capable of.”

“I can’t!” she snapped, suddenly loud and shrill, waving a hand furiously. Neiryn stared at her. “I can’t do anything anymore. I’m not strong enough. My magic is gone. It’s been gone for years now.”

He frowned, taken aback. “What do you mean, your magic is gone?”

She paused for a long moment, looking away. She swallowed hard before she spoke. “It’s… it’s not gone, entirely. It’s just become very weak.”

“But why?” His flame flickered, casting her face in shadows and amber light.

“Because of what happened in Kuda Varai,” she said quietly. “When I tried to seal off the axis.”

He shook his head. “But it worked. You did seal it.”

“It worked, but it broke me. Like… a muscle strain, maybe. It weakened me, and I never got better.” She gave him a hateful look. “I’m not the person you knew before. I’m barely even a mage anymore.”

For a long time, he couldn’t speak.

He had thought of her as almost goddesslike. She had seemed unstoppable. He had seen how special she was before any of her foolish countrymen had. He had known she would leave all of them in the dust, given time.

He’d assumed she’d been thriving since he’d left her. But she’d been languishing all this time, dying the slow death of the craftsman who can’t create.

Being a mage was the core of her identity, especially in Ardani, where people with magic abilities were so rare that they were singled out and either ostracized or worshiped. Who was she, without magic? Perhaps she wondered the same thing.

The despair in her face pained him. “I’m sorry, Kadaki.”

She gave him a suspicious glance, as if she thought he might be feigning sympathy.

“There are healers—”

“I’ve seen every kind of healer there is. Including ones in Ysura,” she added, before he could suggest it. “I’m not looking for advice. I’m only telling you so you’ll stop accusing me of terrible things.”

He could think of nothing else to say other than the fact that they were significantly less likely to ever escape this place without her magic, but he didn’t suppose she would appreciate him bringing that up.

She cleared her throat. “I prioritized healing your most dire injuries. I couldn’t do anything for your arm, but your lungs are stable and your broken ribs are partially healed. You’re not going to die.” She looked around at the uninviting room. “Not from that, at least.”

Neiryn followed her gaze around the room. Their tomb. They were trapped probably hundreds of feet underground, under many tons of rock. But there was a hall leading out of the room, thank Aevyr.

Kadaki’s throat flexed as she swallowed. “Did you see if Roshan and Eliyr…?”

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