Page 32 of Sun Elves of Ardani

He didn’t say anything. Kadaki got the feeling he was a bit surprised by the proposition, which was understandable.

“If we do die here—” She paused, but he didn’t argue this time. “I was thinking about all the things I haven’t done yet. I’ve spent the last five years on a quest to fix my life. I spent all the years before that studying.” She pulled her feet in, though they were still cold. “I’ve never had time for friendships or courting people. I’ve never… done that before. I just want to know what it’s like.”

“And you want my help with that?”

“Yes.”

“I didn’t know you saw me that way.”

“It’s not about you. But there’s no one else here, is there?”

“No, there’s not.” He shifted quietly. “What about your husband?”

“My—” It took her a moment to remember that Roshan was her husband, technically. “We’ve never been intimate.”

There was a brief pause. “And you’re not… monogamous?”

“No. We have an understanding.”

Another long pause. “You can’t be serious.”

Her face began to burn even more. This had been a ridiculous proposal. What had she been thinking? “Look, I only asked because—sun elves enjoy that sort of thing, right? I’ve seen what your people are like. I know sex isn’t a big deal to you all.”

Neiryn didn’t say anything for a few seconds. The air felt thick and heavy as Kadaki waited for him to speak.

“Never mind,” she said. “Just—”

“No,” he interrupted. “I’ll do it.”

She froze. He sounded almost disappointed. “You will?”

“Now you seem uncertain,” he said, his voice tinged with amusement.

“I’m not.” She was. Now that she’d given him permission to touch her, and he’d agreed, she was filled with a strange combination of excitement and fear. Suddenly it felt a bit like she’d committed to more than she could handle. She hadn’t really believed he would say yes.

She sensed him moving closer, but she couldn’t tell exactly where he was or what he was doing. She twitched when she felt him touch her arm.

He paused. “You’re afraid.”

“I’m not.”

His hand felt its way down her arm to rest on her wrist. “You’ve really never slept with anyone?”

“I told you I haven’t.”

“Why not?”

“It just… never came up, I suppose. I’ve always been busy with other things, and…” He didn’t bring up Roshan again. Perhaps he didn’t want to ruin the mood.

He shifted again. She realized he was kneeling in front of her. One of his knees came between hers. She sat very still, waiting.

“I don’t know what to do,” she whispered.

To his credit, he didn’t mock her. He was being a lot less insufferable about this than she’d thought he would be. “What do you want to do?” he whispered back.

“I don’t know. I don’t know how this normally goes.”

“We could start with talking.”

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