Page 45 of Hell Sent

Their past few interactions repeated in his mind over and over. The feel of her on his tongue, her hands on his horns, the heat of her and the sound of her soft gasps. Her knowing smile as she commiserated with him. The way she’d panicked when she’d thought she’d hurt him. The threats he’d made, the way she’d started when he snapped at her, and the hurt on her face when he’d treated her like an inferior.

He paused, gathering his strength. He opened his mouth, and somehow, what came out was, “How do your people show remorse?”

Raiya raised her eyebrows. It wasn’t what either of them had expected. Azreth clenched his hands in his lap.

All this time, he’d been worrying about Raiya betraying him, but he’d betrayed himself in the end. She’d trapped him with kindness instead of cruelty.

Why could he not will himself out of it? Why could he not even make himself try?

“What are you remorseful for?”Raiya asked.

“Injuring you when Nirlan fed you to me. Taking you from the castle by force. Frightening you. Threatening you. Forcing you to serve me.” The list was long. He could have gone on.

She frowned a little. “You didn’t force me. This was a mutually beneficial arrangement from the beginning.”

“I knew you had no other choice.”

She said nothing. Maybe she sensed the truth in his words.

“I would never have hurt you,” he said. “When I said I would, I was lying. I would not keep you against your will.”

A silence dragged.

Then Raiya leaned closer to him. “You’re nothing like what they say, are you?” she said softly. “Demons are just like anyone else. You think and feel just like we do. You’re just trying to live. You’re not monsters. You’re not evil.”

It was the last thing he’d expected her to say—but maybe he should have known better. This was just the way she was.

“Are we not?” he asked. “What is a monster? What makes something evil?”

“Hurting people. That’s evil.”

“I hurt people. I hurt you.”

“Do you think you’re evil?”

“I wouldn’t know.”

“How doyourpeople show remorse?” she asked.

“In the hells, penance is paid through submission and servitude. If I wished to align myself with someone I had previously offended, I would put down my weapons and prostrate myself before them so that they could punish me or feed from me. I would offer myself to them to use however they wished.”If she asked that of him, would he do it? He probably would.

“Have you done that?”

“Not willingly.”

She frowned. “I see.”

“My people express regret when they want something from someone. Apologies are made for diplomatic reasons. But that’s not what I want. I feel regret because… I’m afraid I have been cruel.”

There was another silence. Raiya was studying him, measuring him.

“I don’t think you’re cruel,” she said, more gently than he deserved. He glanced over at her skeptically.

“Tell me what service you require in order to forgive me,” he said.

“An apology is enough on its own, as long as it’s heartfelt.”

That did not seem like enough. But he supposed he could keep trying to make it up to her. He would never be as kind as she was, but he would keep trying for as long as she would let him. “Then… I apologize.”

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