Page 165 of Emylia

“I want to be painfully clear. Whatever you’ve got swirling inside your head, it’s not true.”

His words left me baffled. I opened my mouth, closed it then opened it again. “What are you talking about?”

Exasperated, Maalikai ran a hand through his hair, leaving the obsidian locks disheveled. “You have an issue with self-sabotage.”

Irritation reddened my skin, heady heat bubbling to the surface. “Excuse me?”

“Sebastian and I talked…”

“You’ve got to be kidding me. You and Sebastian finally get together and talk about me and decide who I am. You have no right.”

“You gave me the right when you broke my heart.” Hurt crossed his features as he fixed me with a stare that shook my insides.

“What?”

An irritated sigh left him as he leaned against the wall. “We did things. Things I don’t do with just anyone…”

“Maalikai…” An embarrassing shade of red crept over my face for a second time.

“No, you need to hear this.” The way his voice broke crumbled me. Against my better judgment, I shut my mouth. “What happened two nights ago, wasn’t about getting into your pants. What happened,at least for me, happened because you’ve stolen my heart. Do you really think I would’ve let that happen if I didn’t want to be with you?”

“Yes.” The word left me before I could cage it.

“What, because you think I’m a manwhore?” I couldn’t even hold his gaze; I was so ashamed of my unspoken accusation. “Not that you even bothered to ask, but I’m not. Call me a sucker, but I believe in love. Yes, I’ve been with women before. But this—this is something. Something real. At least it is forme.” He pointed to himself, emphasizing how deeply he felt about me. And man did it sting.

My heart swelled with his words and as much as I wanted him to be right, that I wanted this to be real, I knew there couldn’t be an us. “Maalikai, I don’t think this is a good idea.”

“The only thing that is stopping it, is you.”

“That’s not true.”

“It is. You believe you’re not worthy of love.” He took a step forward, invading my personal space and stealing my ability to breathe. “You believe you’re not good enough for me or Sebastian, so you make all the excuses in the world, so this won’t work. Then you convince yourself it’s true.”

What in Nexus?

“I— I don’t.” I stammered, at a loss for words.

“You do. But this time, I’m not going to let you.”

I shook my head, shame consuming me. “Isleptwith Sebastian.”

Hurt flickered through his eyes, onyx instantly inking through his irises. “You what?”

“Ilovehim.”

Silence fell between us, becoming suffocating. Maalikai’s jaw clenched, that storm-slick stillness coiling in his shoulders.

“Do you want to be with him?” The question cut deeper than any accusation ever could.

"I..." I didn’t have an answer that wouldn’t hurt both of us.

His voice cracked through the quiet—low and bitter. “Because if you do, if you’ve already chosen him, then say it. Don’t string me along like I’m some fucking placeholder.”

My chest caved in. “No. Gods, no—it’s not like that.”

“Then what is it, Emylia?” His voice rose, just a little, and the way he used my name stung more than anything else.

“Because I’m standing here trying not to fall apart while you tell me you love someone else. That you'rein lovewith someone else.”

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