Page 166 of Emylia

Tears burned my eyes, unapologetic as they streamed down my face. “I didn’t plan for it to happen… but I don’t regret it either.”

His voice dropped, brittle. “So where does that leave us?”

I swallowed the lump in my throat and prepared to hand him the one thing that might break him.

The truth.

“I will always love him. I will always bein lovewith him. I can't change that.”

Maalikai looked at me like I was the most beautiful thing he’d ever seen… and the one thing that could break him.

“And me?” His voice cracked, soft and trembling. “Are you in love with me?”

I blinked, struggling to find air. “I—I never meant to fall in love with you. But I am.”

A pause. Then, quietly?—

“That’s the worst part,”he whispered. “Neither did I. I never meant to fall in love with you, but here we are.” Air whooshed from him. “And now? I’m incurable.”

His voice broke, low and shaking. I’d never seen this side of him. Never seen this much emotion poor out of someone so carefully held together, full of things he never let anyone see. Only I had the special ability to break him. To bring him to his knees. And Gods… did it ruin me.

“I don’t care that you slept with him. I don’t even care if you love him. As long as there’s still some part of you that loves me, too. That wants me, too.”

My breathing stuttered. “You still want to be with me?”

“Emylia, you are a truly stunning creature. You make me feel like life is worth living, even though I have lost so damn much. Without you, I feel like I can no longer breathe, like there is no point even existing anymore. As much as you fucking frustrate me, you are everything. I would doanythingfor you.”

He ran a hand through his hair, letting the obsidian strands fall in sexy disarray, as he took another unsteady breath.

“I wouldn’t just watch the world burn for you,” he said, voice cracking as he stepped closer, fists clenched at his sides. “I’dspark the damn flint myselfand watch the whole fucking thing turn to ash—just for thechanceto be with you.”

His chest heaved, like he couldn’t hold the weight of it anymore. He ran a hand through his hair again—agitated, raw, unraveling in front of me.

“You are beyond enough,” he said fiercely, eyes blazing. “And you are so damn worthy of my love ithurtsto think you’d believe anything else.”

The words poured from him, unfiltered, like they’d been caged for too long and now refused to stay quiet. “So if you don’t want to be with me, that’s fine.” He exhaled sharply, gaze dropping for just a second, like the truth of it scorched him. “But it won’t be because you weren’t enough.” His eyes locked with mine again—pleading, certain. “It’ll be becauseI’mnot worthy ofyou.” One last tortured breath. “Because you don’t want me.” The breath tore from him–sharp, sudden–like letting go might unravel him. “Or… because you’ve chosenhim.”

Before I had a chance to say anything, he left. I went to follow but stopped before I made it to the door. I had no idea what I was going to say. I had no logical argument, everything he said made complete sense. I finally started to believe that he wanted this more than he wanted to breathe.

That he wantedme.

Every shattered part of me.

Maalikai was right. The only person standing in the way of us… was me. Not him. Not Sebastian.

Me.

I was sabotaging everything–unintentionally, maybe, but no less destructively. I was too afraid to be completely vulnerable. Too afraid I wouldn’t be enough. That if I gave myself fully to one, I’d lose the other. That wanting both made me selfish. Shameful. Unworthy.

It wasn’t just fear of being hurt. It was the fear of how the world would see me. HowIwould see me. By protecting my own heart, I wasn’t saving it.

I was shattering it.

And both of theirs too.

I sat on the edge of my bed, eyes shut tight, my head spinning with images of the man who was likely still just outside my wall. Still guarding me. Even as I destroyed him.

Utter confusion bled into every nerve, a storm of uncertainty cloaking me like a second skin. And for the first time in my life, I had no idea what to do.

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