Page 44 of Wicked Player

Not that she asked, but how in the hell could she not put it together that I was the man who had his hands all over every single inch of her body?

Did it mean anything to her?

“Yeah, I said that about Paige a time or two as well. Didn’t work though.”

“Seriously, Beaux. Drop it.”

He didn’t relent. I shouldn’t have thought he would. He wasn’t our quarterback and leader of our team for nothing. “Why don’t you date?”

“Seriously?” I turned to him. He was exasperating as hell. “We’re going to do this girlie shit? I’m trying to watch films.”

“It’s ten o’clock and you’ve been watching films for six hours.”

His brows arched. Damn. Had I really been sitting in this dark room for so long? No wonder he figured there was something wrong with me.

“Don’t have time to date.”

“Get that. You’re committed to football. Helping others. Running your charities. But I’m just wondering when you’re going to stop living in the shadows of Harrison and what your parents want and finally go reaching for something for yourself.”

“What the fuck?” The hell was his problem?

He lifted his hand, but I slapped it away. I didn’t need his damn explanations. Crossing the line and bringing up my brother? My parents?

“Hear me out,” Beaux said. He pushed off the chair and stood. I was right behind him, chest out, heart thundering, adrenaline rushing. Goddamn. I’d never wanted to punch my quarterback more.

“No.”

“Listen, I get it. I do. You think I didn’t want to do the same shit after my mom died? You think I didn’t care about Shannon more than I did myself? I get it, Bryant. Swear to you, I fucking get it. But you’re also over thirty years old and outside of football, you don’t have a damn life.”

I had a damn life. In the private walls and rooms of Velvet and that was as much as I needed.

“You seriously don’t have any idea what you’re talking about.”

He shrugged. Dropped his hands. “Maybe not. Maybe I’m wrong, but I know and Powell knows and half the men on the team will tell you that if you’re slaving away working only on your career, you’re only living half the life you deserve. Whatever it is you want and won’t reach for, whatever it is that has you looking like you’re going to pummel my face, reach for it, Gage. Fucking grab a hold and take it and I swear to you, life will only get better.”

He spun and headed out of the room. I was breathing like a dragon long after he’d disappeared.

Damn him. Beaux was a good guy, but I never realized how damn smart and wise he was. Still didn’t mean I was admitting it.

But that didn’t mean he was wrong. I’d lived my entire life, even while Harrison was sick, making sure I never brought them any disappointment, any embarrassment, working twice as hard at being three times as good as anyone else to make their lives easier.

When in the hellwasI going to start thinking of my own wants and needs?

* * *

Tuesdays wereour off days during the season. We spent Mondays watching films of the previous games, getting screamed at whether we won or lose by Coach Pomville, and received our accolades where they were due.

For my part, I’d been lucky to miss most of the encouraging in the form of shortening when I’d had to give the tour of the hospital. That’d been why I was at the facility so late watching films on my own. Just because I missed the day didn’t mean I got the day off.

Tuesday was our day off, a day where players usually spent it with their families since they missed them on the long practice days and weekends we traveled.

I didn’t take a day off. I still went to work, either at charities or for the last two years, working on the construction of the new wing.

Now, with not a whole lot to do and nothing planned for the opening, I still found myself wandering down the hallways of the hospital.

I got up at five thirty, early even for me and took off to the gym where I swam for an hour, lifted for another before I realized I had to chill the hell out or I’d overdo it.

My sides were sore from a few hard tackles and while working out was important, most of our strength training occurred during the offseason.