Page 108 of Before We Fell

I shoved myself to sitting. It’d do me well to be more than half-awake when he did speak. His arms were thrown to the back of the couch. A quiet, tap, tap, tap of his hands beating the cushion made a rhythm that matched the counting in my head.

Ten Mississippi

Eleven Mississippi

Twelve Mississippi

“Your mom and I like her.”

There it was. He might as well have spoken through a bullhorn such was the magnitude of that simple statement.

“Dad—”

“Like her for you too. She’s so sweet, too good for you really, but she smooths out all those rough, focused edges of yours you’ve always had.”

Awesome. A hangover with a side of therapy from my old man.

I scowled at him but said nothing. He’d probably interrupt me again anyway. My dad liked to do that. Had something to say and took his time doing it but once he had a train of thought going, he wouldn’t be derailed with things like facts.

Like…her brother killing his daughter.

I mean, that was a pretty big fact for him to just ignore. Right?

“Riley misses her, too,” he said. See? I didn’t need to respond for this conversation to continue. “Asked about her this morning. Asked why she wasn’t going to school. Yeah, she misses her teacher a lot.”

“Riley’s doing school.” I’d yanked her immediately. She was finishing the year doing their online schooling. She’d get everything she needed in the comfort and safety of her own space and time.

My dad knew this considering I’d seen the disappointment in his face when I made that decision. But God, what was I supposed to do? Send Riley into Lauren’s classroom on Monday, have her sit ten feet from her. Did my dad really think Riley would be able to concentrate on school with the memory of Thanksgiving night still so recent? The girl deserved some damn time and space to have her own healing, didn’t she?

I made the decision that was best for her. So what that it also made it easier for me not to hear Lauren’s name mentioned. That wasn’t a factor.

My dad didn’t take his eyes off the television. Didn’t even react to my statement. Instead, his hands kept tapping the cushion and his head started bobbing, like he had some playful music in his head. But oh no, there was more story coming.

I crossed my arms over my chest and waited.

“From what I’ve heard, she doesn’t have much relationship with any of her family. Seems to me she might be blood with him, but that don’t mean he’s family, son.”

I didn’t miss the fact he hadn’t spoken Travis’s name.

I’d play along with him.

“Okay, Dad. Let’s discuss this. Let’s say Travis goes to prison for what he did.”

“Damn straight he will.” His tapping stopped and he speared me with a scowl. That was the emotion I wanted.

“Okay.” I leaned forward, feet to the floor, knees spread, hands clasped together. My years of law too ingrained in me not to see this down the rabbit path. I tossed open my hands. “Now, let’s say Lauren and I get through this. Let’s say we get married. We’re happy. We can push aside Travis and her family.”

“Like that.”

“Now let’s say her parents show up someday. A year down the road. Maybe five. Maybe we have kids and they demand to see their grandchildren.”

A muscle jumped in my dad’s jaw, tightening. Yeah, not so easy when you thought of that, was it?

“Noah—”

Oh no. I was just getting started. “Now,” I shrugged. “Let’s say that doesn’t happen. But maybe something else does. Maybe, they save their money, they scavenge up the fees, who knows, sell their home and move to a dumpy apartment and take the earnings of that sale and hire someone to appeal.” I shoved a finger to my chest. “Someone like me. The best. They search the entire country, they get a lawyer willing to take the case and let’s say, Travis doesn’t end up in jail for life for what he’s done. Let’s say he gets out on parole. Five years down the road. Ten years. Hell, maybe twenty…”

I let that thought linger. My dad’s body, relaxed as relaxed could be when he entered was now strung tight, hands balled into fists. His jaw clenched and eyes narrowed. He still couldn’t look at me, but I caught the tightening of every bone in his body as I spoke.

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