Page 13 of Before We Fell

He tugged her down the hallway without saying a word or acknowledging me.

But who cared? He could be a jerk all he wanted.

I got Riley to smile and talk to me. It was the best way to end the day.

Five

Noah

Contrary to thepopular opinion of most lawyers and judges and police officers in St. Louis, I didn’t get my kicks by being a complete asshole. Sometimes the habit was hard to kick, and once re-started, difficult to stall.

Which was why, as I walked to my truck with Riley’s hand in mine, I couldn’t think of a damn word to say.

Shesmiledat her teacher. She laughed. She skipped.

She fuckingtalkedto her.

Nothing made me feel like a bigger failure than the moment she turned to Miss Frazier—Lauren—and showed her absolute excitement about getting to see the horses.

She spent several nights a week at my parents’ horse ranch over the summer and never once did she smile or act excited about being there, even though I knew how much she loved it when she visited with her mom and dad.

But for me? I didn’t get a smile.

And her teacher? Who she knew for a week? She goteverything.

So yeah, I took it out on the sweet and curvy looking teacher who looked barely legal even though she had to be to be teaching.

When I first caught sight of them, skipping down the hall of all things, I had to fight against rolling my eyes. Everyone around Riley these last few months went into some hyper-drive, over the top excitement when they spoke to her as if psychotic happy eyes and a smile the size of Texas would get her to cooperate. I figured her teacher was doing the same thing, but then I saw the look on Riley’s as she joined her.

Lauren smiling down at her.

Riley grinning back. Skipping. Smiling.

I got mumbles and frowns and nightmares, night after night, and she gave the best parts of her to her teacher.

What in the hell was I doing wrong? Not that I would admit that to the teacher who smiled so sweetly it made my teeth ache, and other parts of me unfortunately noticed. But damn, it hurt. I gave up my life for Riley. For Amanda and Jake. I gave up my career, my home, my entire social life in St. Louis to do what was best for her and I hadn’t seen a damn smile from my niece for six months.

Until I was given custody, all she ever gave me was smiles and giggles and laughter and fun. So much damn fun.

Shit. I scrubbed a hand down my face and sighed.

Maybe I needed the teacher’s help with her. No one wanted Riley acting more like the sweet and exuberant child she used to be before her life turned to shit than I did.

And that photo she drew? What a kick to the nuts. Sometimes I liked to believe this was all a dream. That I’d wake up in my bed in my penthouse condo and Peyton wouldn’t be sleeping next to me. I’d roll to my side, my alarm buzzing at five a.m. like it always used to, and then I’d get out of bed, go to work, get a call from Amanda or a text with a completely inappropriate meme and life would be what it was supposed to be.

Anything but this.

Anything but seeing Riley so hurt and frail and sad and so, so damn quiet itkilledme.

“Did you have fun at school today?” I asked, squeezing her hand and reaching around to open the back door to my truck. I’d sold my Mercedes sports car before we moved. A sixty thousand dollar sports car wasn’t exactly practical in Carlton.

Riley climbed up in the truck. “No.”

“Hmmm.” I helped take off her book bag and tossed it in the seat next to her. As she buckled in, I fought against the questions pummeling me.Why? Did someone make you sad? How can I make it better? If someone hurt you, I’ll kill them.That one would have been worst of all. I was a problem solver. A puzzle fixer. That we still had no evidence as to who killed her parents and no closure in sight kept me up at night, practically clawing the walls with frustration. But not being able to fix Riley?

That hurt worse.

“I know something that might make your sucky day better,” I said, grinning. I wiggled my brows at her like I used to. She pressed her lips into a smile and her eyes showed the tiniest glimmer of wonder. “Ice cream. Chocolate, right?”

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