Page 71 of Before We Fell

“People can change, Lauren. You have to believe that.”

I didn’t have to do anything. Shaking my head, I splayed my hand on the counter to hold myself up. Damn this hurt. Like it always did. They refused to ever see the bad in Travis and ignored the good in me. Noah’s hand appeared in my line of sight and he drifted his hand over mine on the counter. With one finger, he traced the outline of my hand, so softly, so tenderly, I was momentarily distracted from my mom.

“Okay, Mom.” Whatever. She could bury her head as much as she wanted.

“So will we see you for Thanksgiving? If he gets the help he asked us about, he could have visitors by then. And wouldn’t that be great, Lauren? All of us together again…”

Tears stung my eyes and I choked them back down with a thick swallow.

“Yeah, Mom. That’d be great. Did you give Travis my number?”

Warmth pressed to my chin, and Noah tilted my chin up. His eyes danced between mine and if I wasn’t on the phone, was able to move, I would have pressed my thumb to the harsh furrow between his brows. His concern was a living breathing thing.

I tugged my hand from beneath his and wrapped it around his other wrist near my chin.

“No, he didn’t ask. He said he’d see you soon, though. Thanksgiving, okay? Let’s plan on it.”

I’d spend time with her again never. “I’ll check my calendar. Talk soon, okay?”

“Okay, sweetie! Have a great night.” She sang the words like she actually cared. And that was the beauty of my mom. When she got what she wanted, she was the happiest, sweetest woman you ever met. Too bad that ninety-five percent of the time she lived her life oblivious to reality. Perhaps then she would have been able to find a way to be happier more often.

I dropped the phone into my purse and turned to Noah. “Before you ask, that was my mom. My brother’s looking for me and she wants me to come home for the holidays. Somehow, my drug addicted loser of a brother has convinced her he’s ready for rehab.”

His head tilted, thumb still at my chin, sweeping back. “That’s not a good thing?”

“Well, the last time he convinced them he was ready for that, he then showed up at my apartment in college, stole all my cash and my roommate’s, and then stole another roommate’s car. That was found stripped down to the bare bones about two weeks later outside Des Moines, my brother wasn’t heard from for a year and a half, and I lost the only two friends I had in school. So…” I shrugged. “Travis leaves destruction in his wake everywhere he goes and somehow my mom has convinced herself that someday, he’ll show up and be different. And now he’s looking for me, which means nothing good.”

“Why would he look for you?”

“Because when he’s really desperate, he doesn’t go to Mom and Dad. He hits them up when he can make it believable he’s willing to change. But when things get dark and shitty, it’s me he comes to and steals from because he knows they won’t believe me. Trust me, I’ve been doing this song and dance with my parents and Travis since I was ten.”

“Will he hurt you?”

Travis had the ability to scare the complete crap out of me. It just depended on how high he was when he found me. “He hasn’t yet.”

I dug through my purse like relief would be found in the bottom of my slouch bag. “Can we just go? I don’t want to talk about this anymore.”

“I’m not really feeling all that great that you’re not sure if your brother would hurt you, Lauren.” His hand drifted to my shoulder and he turned me, stepped up to me, forcing me to face him. “Has he?” A muscle in his jaw popped. And his eyes flared. “Has he hurt you?”

“Not physically, he just destroys my emotions. It’s fine. Really. Get me somewhere delicious for dinner, give me a glass of wine, and I’ll move on from this. But can we please stop talking about it?”

“We don’t have to go if you’d rather stay here.”

No. No no no.

“No. This is what Travis does. He shows up, gets people all worked up and I’m the one who suffers for it. Seriously, Noah. I’ve really been looking forward to this. I want a weekend away.”

He still looked doubtful. I was ready to forget I ever listened to him and answered that call. Part of him was right though. Now that I knew the score, I wouldn’t think about it as much. It was the same shit. Different day. I knew exactly how to move him past this.

Placing my hand to his chest, I tilted my head up, rolled to my toes and kissed his jaw.

“Please trust me. Besides, I bought some real fun items to show you…later…after dinner that you do not want to miss out on.”

His hand on mine on the counter moved to press on my lower back, holding me against him.

“Is that so?” One corner of his lips lifted. It was his eyes I was focused on. Dark, rich like chocolate, burned bright with interest. Arousal.

The hard bulge on my belly made the last one more than clear.

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