Page 55 of Cocky Player

“It wasn’t your fault.”

“I know.But there were still a dozen decisions I could have made differently.Could I have gone to a house?The Johnson’s mom stayed home.She would have been there.Or taken me to school.I could have gone home and called my mom.They would have understood.I could have bit his hand, scratched him.”

“You were ten, Brenna.”

“Yeah, but it wasn’t like I hadn’t had the stranger talk a million times with my parents, either.”I shook off the lingering oily sensation that always covered me when I replayed this.The millions of decisions I could have made.The safer option.The smarter one.Was it any wonder I was such a wreck and needed time to come to conclusions now?

“I wasn’t the only girl he had.”I sniffed and then screw it.My tears would fall whether or not I tried to stave them off.“He’d smack us around when we cried.Fed us once a day.We were all hooked to chains in a basement.”

“Fucking Christ,” Connor growled.His grip on my hands tightened so severely I flinched.“I don’t know if I can hear anymore without wanting to find him and kill him myself.”

It wasn’t funny, but I chuckled.“You can’t.He was killed three months into his prison sentence.Apparently felons and thieves and murderers draw the line at sex traffickers.”

“Sex…”

“Yeah.Eventually he took us to a shipping container.I didn’t know where we were going to be sent, but it was on the coast.Dark.Cold.We’d barely eaten, hadn’t been cleaned in a week since I’d been there although some of the other girls were there much longer.We sat there, sniffing away our cries, waiting for death.”

I crumbled then.Shoved my head into the crook of his neck and let him hold me while I cried, horrific, huge tears.I couldn’t forget those memories no matter how often I tried.The cold salty air dried our skin even in the dark and our oatmeal turned to an occasional cheese stick, a bottle of water.The bare minimum to keep us alive and even then someone would be close by.When we screamed, we were beaten and kicked and it didn’t matter who had started it.Once the men entered the container, we were all punished until one of them, a girl younger than me with two matted braids, stopped screaming, passed out, and never woke up again.

I took his embrace and his comfort and his quietly muttered curse words and wrapped in his strength and arms and comfort, I swore I could have conqueredanythingin my life.

It was when I was sniffing that another hand curled around the back of my neck.Much smaller, not nearly as warm, and then Gina’s lips were at the top of my head.“You okay, honey?”

“Yeah.”

“Be good to her,” she whispered and I knew she was warning Connor.

He didn’t flinch or growl as he replied, “Of course.You headed out?”

“I can stay,” Gina said and this was why she was my best friend.

“No.Go.Don’t stay home for me.Not anymore.”I pushed off Connor and he untangled his arms from me enough so I could meet Gina’s concerned expression.

“It’s just a date.”

“You’ve done it enough for me.No more.That’s what we promised, right?”

I wasn’t stupid.Gina found one-night stands and quick flings and would some nights not come home in college but they were rare.She didn’t date more seriously or spend more time away because she wanted to be there for me, crawl into my tiny twin bunk bed when I woke up screaming, dripping in sweat and tears.

She was the best human on the planet.

“Okay.Love you, shortcake.”

“Go away, gingersnap.”

She laughed softly and gave me another quick squeeze before flashing a wink to Connor.“Later, hot stuff.”

“See ya, Hulk.”

She snorted and moments later the door was closed and I was through the worst of my tears and memories.

“She wasn’t kidding when she said she was protective of you.”

“Gina’s the best.”I exhaled harshly, shook off the tightness in my limbs and tried to regain some control.It was that strange feeling of a cathartic cry where I was exhausted and equally energized.“I have nightmares sometimes.Not often, but she was my roommate starting our junior year of high school.Then she insisted on attending Vanderwilde with me.She’s spent a lot of time helping me.”

I curled up off the couch with the excuse of space and needing water.Connor didn’t take his eyes off me as I went to the kitchen, grabbed two bottles of water from the fridge and chugged one of them completely before sitting next to him on the couch.

“I was found, you know.”

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