Page 88 of Time Out

“I don’t know.”

“You have to. Please. Remember when you were so mad I got in trouble because it meant you couldn’t leave? I can help you now, Ruth. I swear it. Please. Go to the Clancey’s. Tell Mark and Beth what’s happening and they’ll keep you safe. They’ll get you to me.”

I hoped. I hadn’t talked to them since they left, but I knew what happened to me was the reason and their eye-opening moment to realize what my father preached wasn’t all that biblical after all.

She sniffed. “Are you sure? Because if they go to Daddy…”

Mark Clancey would only ever talk to my father again if it was to punch him in the face. I was certain of it.

“They won’t tell. I can call them.”

“No!” she shouted and then quieted her voice. “I gotta go. But I don’t know when Zach will be done with Daddy, and if I’m not here…”

“If you are, you’re going to be beaten, and you’ve done nothing wrong. It’s not right, but I’m sorry. There’s no way I’m ever going to return home again unless it’s to grab you and our sisters and run like hell. No one deserves to live like that. There’s so much more to life than what Daddy teaches. So many more people who love Jesus and show it without rods and paddles and bruises and rules.”

“That’s the world talking.”

“No, Ruth. It’s biblical. I swear it.” Not that I did much studying anymore, and I hadn’t been able to come close to forcing myself through the doors of a church since then. But Mama B prayed before the meal yesterday and talked about her faith and she and Dave weren’t people who I could see raising a hand to their children.

“I just wanted to warn you. What Daddy is planning and how mad he was, that’s all. If you fix it, if you never do that again… if you stay off television, I won’t get in more trouble.”

It killed me to know even now there were consequences to my actions far away from Missouri. But I wouldn’t give up the life I was creating, and once they knew I was pregnant. Well, Ruth might not survive it.

As much as I wanted to protect her, I couldn’t do what she was asking. “I can’t do that. Davis, that boy, he’s on TV all the time, and I want to start singing. It’s going to happen, but it’s cruel and wrong for Daddy to beat you because I’m not there. Don’t you see that?”

“If you’d never left…”

“We’d all be black and blue. I couldn’t stop that. I’m sorry I couldn’t protect you from it, but if you come to me, I’ll keep you safe, and then we’ll figure out what to do. I promise you. To the ends of the earth, I promise you that.”

“Do they still live on Willow Wood?”

She meant the Clanceys, and I choked over a sob clawing its way out my throat. “Last I knew. Yeah. Just through the field and across the creek by that boulder.”

“I know how to get there. Daddy says we’re not allowed past the creek.”

Because of them. Because they strayed from the flock, and now the entire church was cut off from them.

“Please, Ruth. You need to go.”

“Okay. Can I… can I call you when I get there?”

“Please. Definitely. But go before Zach and Daddy are done with their meeting. You know exactly what’s gonna happen to you.”

“You promise we’ll help Martha and the rest?”

“I’ll help everyone or die trying.”

She laughed, a small chuckle over a sob that tore at my throat and ripped at my heart. None of us deserved any of that life. Not even for my brothers, for growing up and thinking any of this was okay.

“I’ll try, Maggie. I’ll try.”

“Good. Now delete this from the call log, put the phone back where you got it, and run, Ruth. Fast as you can.”

We spoke for a few more minutes. I had her stay on the phone when she went back to the barn to replace the phone. At the very last moment, I whispered I loved her.

She said yeah, hung up.

I turned to Davis.

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