Page 79 of Love Me Gently

She got straight A’s and went to a small Christian college.

I struggled to get B’s and wanted nothing to do with school after college.

She wanted to stay in this town forever and have babies and raise them in the church she grew up in.

I murdered mine and fled town to worse decisions.

No, I couldn’t see Kari. Not yet.

“Are we going to do this today?” Next to me, Cole bumped his hip against me.

“Yeah.” I laughed and shook my head. “I’m surprised neighbors haven’t called or shouted at us.”

Who knew how long I’d been standing on the sidewalk after getting out of Cole’s truck? Granted, it wasn’t like anyone could recognize me with the coat and my hood pulled up, but they’d undoubtedly recognize Cole.

“I’m scared,” I muttered and started walking forward.

“Keep being scared and keep moving. The fear will go away.”

He’d become wise in the years since I was gone, and I wasn’t always sure how to handle this new, bigger, manlier, and calmer version of Cole, but right then, as I started up the sidewalk, I was thankful he was next to me. So thankful I reached out and grabbed his hand. He tightened his grip on me immediately, and I let that warmth rush through me again.

“Thank you,” I rasped. “Thank you for saving me.”

He tugged on my hand, and I glanced up at him. “I helped get you out of a bad situation, Trina. You’re the one saving yourself. Take the credit where it’s due and own it, okay? You’restrongenough to do all this. You’re brave enough to move on.”

Great. Just what I needed. To be crying before I even saw my mom. “Sometimes you look at me, and then I look in the mirror, and I’m so confused because I don’t see anything you do.”

“Then you’re not looking close enough.” He bent down, got his face close to mine. Close enough I could count the whiskers growing on his unshaved cheek. Close enough I could see the gold flecks that rimmed his pupils. “When I look at you, Trina, I seeeverything.”

“Oh my…God! Praise the Lord!”

I whipped my head toward the front door. The now opened door. Only a glass storm door separated me from the woman who had her hands clasped in front of her mouth, her hair much grayer than I remembered with grooved lines around her eyes, but they were the same eyes.

It was the woman who’d always loved me beyond reason. The woman I’d turned my back on out of fear and shame.

I flashed her a shaky grin and held onto Cole’s hand with all the strength I had.

“Hi, Mom.”

And then I burst into tears.

I wasn’tsure how it was possible to have more tears in my body. I was certain I’d poured them all over my mom’s shoulder as soon as Cole opened the door and guided me into her arms. Without him there, it was possible we’d both still be crying on opposite sides of the glass partition.

It felt like a lifetime ago, but only minutes, and yet between the time lapse, my father had walked in the back door, jolted at the sight of me and then more tears fell.

“My daughter has come home,” he kept repeating, murmuring it while he held me in his arms.

“Dad—”

I was definitely sure that was the only word I’d spoken. Mom. Dad. I could say nothing but who they were. No explanations. I hadn’t even gotten around to the apologies yet, or why I was there.

Cole was never far away, keeping an eye on all of us, bringing me tissues. Refilling waters.

My mom cupped my cheek where I was sandwiched so tightly in between them it was like they were afraid to give me an inch of space for fear I’d vanish. “You’re so beautiful,” she whispered, “and you’rehere.”

“I’m here,” I repeated.

I was in my childhood home. Wrapped in the loving arms of my parents, and I closed my eyes, believing that if I opened them, all the stains of my past would be wiped away.

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