Page 51 of Love Me Boldly

Her dark blue eyes had once been a warm, rich color, and now there appeared to be no life in them.

“Mom?”

She shoved her way past me, making me jump back before the baby in her arms slammed into me.

“What are you doing here?”

“Where’s your father?”

She rocked back and forth as she asked, deadened, drug-addled eyes flicking every which way but at my face, at the daughter who stood in front of her.

“Prison,” I said, before I could filter myself. Who would expect it?

What was shedoinghere?

She jolted, and at least she hadn’t known. Caroline’s earlier warning rushed back to me. She’d called. She’d been looking for us.

Looks like she found us. “Why do you have a baby?”

She flinched again and looked down, eyes widening like she’d forgotten she was holding anything in the first place. How could that happen when the baby’s face was now a deep shade of red and screaming, filling the air in the trailer?

“Oh. Here.” She shoved it at me so fast I almost dropped it before my arms grabbed for it on instinct.

“Can’t take care of him. You do it. All this shit I have is here.” She dropped a weathered, worn, and disgustingly dirty bag onto the floor. “Tell your dad I stopped by.”

She skirted past me. My mind was still frozen. This baby was screaming. My addict of a mother was leaving?

“Mom? What are…”

“Don’t got time. Ride’s leaving. And I definitely don’t have time to take care of that. Needs his family, though. So there…you and your dad can handle it.”

“What?” I rushed after her, but for being high as a kite and frail, she moved quickly. “Mom!”

She didn’t stop rushing down the stairs, out to the gravel drive. She wasn’t joking about having a ride.

It was dark, and I couldn’t see who was driving, but she climbed into the passenger seat of a rusted, maroon car, far older than me. It peeled out so fast that gravel kicked up and hit the side of my Jimmy before it turned and disappeared.

The baby screamed again, and my jaw dropped as I watched my mother take off, leaving me again…

With abrother?

FIFTEEN

HOLLY

He was so little. So tiny. He also wasn’t very old. The first thing I figured out how to do was feed him, and thankfully in the wretched and dirty bag my mom had dropped on the floor, there’d been a dozen diapers, two empty bottles, and two small cans of formula.

My mind spun as I tried to bounce the baby and then feed him. My ears ached from the piercing scream he refused to let go of.

But finally—finally—I managed to read the can of formula, fill the bottle with water, add the powder, and as soon as the bottle was brought to his lips, the boy quieted.

“Holy crap,” I whispered as he sucked on the bottle. I figured out how to prop him in my lap and dragged the bag over to me, where I pulled out everything inside I could find.

I found another, smaller pile of diapers, two small cloths I figured were for burping but looked like they needed a decent washing, and at the very bottom of the small bag was an envelope.

I tossed the wrinkled envelope onto the coffee table and tried with all my might to figure out what in the world just happened. This had to be a dream. This was a nightmare. I was subconsciously feeling alone, needing someone for company, feeling despair over everything with Graham, and that my subconscious conjured up my mother and some random baby she threw at me before disappearing.

“Except I’m awake,” I muttered and blew out a breath and closed my eyes. When I opened them, it was to the sound of the baby quietly sucking on the bottle, his tiny little face scrunched and pink. Tears were drying on his cheeks from all his crying. I reached out and tenderly brushed my fingertip along his cheek, wiping away wet tears. His eyes opened and closed again, but as he did, a tiny milk-filled sigh escaped the side of his mouth, and I swore he burrowed closer to me.

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