Page 109 of Drown My Sorrow

“No,” Kelly says at last. “I’ve never wanted them, but if you wanted to, I would make it happen.”

“I don’t care,” Shale says.

“Same,” Beau agrees.

Ezy looks up and shakes his head. “My parents were awful. I have no interest in having children.”

I can’t believe I’m hearing this.

“I…no. No, I don’t,” Gael admits.

I turn on Keagan. “And you?”

He smiles and shakes his head. “Trick question.”

“It’s not a trick question.”

“It is because you don’t want them. You’re trying to trap us into saying something to prove that we won’t work out.”

“It’s not that I don’t want them,” I growl in frustration. “I can’t have kids.” My voice is louder than I expect, echoing into the bedroom and revealing a truth I haven’t told anyone.

Keagan had his mouth open, but now he stops, reading the anguish that must be apparent through the bond.

Ezy rolls out of bed and pads towards us, wrapping his arms around me from behind.

“If you want to have kids, we can find a way. Surrogacy, adoption, fostering. Whatever you want.”

“I don’t want them. I’m already broken, but you guys are their heirs to the Boothe fortune and Alpha Labels, and you have family who will want-”

“Wait! Stop.” Gael sits up and glares in my direction. “My parents were absent parents. I raised Noah. They didn’t even notice-” Gael cuts himself off. “My parents were terrible. So were Ezy’s. And that kind of thing lingers and leaves a nasty taste. I don’t care about the line and neither does my pack. Kelly has a gazillion siblings and cousins.”

“Two siblings and four cousins,” Kelly says dryly. “Not quite a gazillion but close. And he’s right. I’ve never desired being a parent.”

“Look at that, we’re all in agreement,” Shale whispers and smirks at me.

I growl at him, but he just rolls on his side and curls up against Kelly.

“Come to bed and growl at us in the morning.”

“I don’t want kids, for the record. I don’t like children. So what do you think about that? I know that might make me a monster, but, yeah, I don’t care.” I snarl at them, still trying to get a rise.

“That’s it. Enough talk.”

Keagan picks me up and dumps me in the middle of the bed. Everyone climbs in, and then Beau claps the lights off.

“Do you know what I always wanted to do?” I say because I can’t turn my mind off. My anger has fizzled out, and I’m lost now in this somber anguish.

“What?”

“I wanted to have a family dinner. We never had them when I was growing up. Dad was always working late. But I see it on TV, and I think, how nice would it be to have a dinner today and say what we loved about today. To talk and drink wine.”

“We can do that every night for the rest of your life if you really want,” Ezy says. “If you were sitting at the table, what would you say is what you loved about today?”

“Hmm. I think this. Laying in bed with you guys. I’m not alone in the dark. There are no scary noises outside or in the other rooms. It’s just us in a bed, safe and warm.”

Beau rolls into me and kisses my shoulder. He drags me towards him and starts massaging my leg. I let out a little moan of pleasure as he gets a spot that is aching.

“I loved seeing Kelly ride that wave and achieve his goal,” Shale says suddenly. “It made me want to do better.”

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