Page 208 of Drown My Sorrow

Her eyes crinkle at the corners, and she bites her bottom lip to stop the laugh. “Oh, really?”

“I think so.”

“Well, in that case, have fun, and wear the sexy underwear I bought you.” She pauses. “Do I need to decorate again?”

I snort a laugh. “No! Never ever again!”

We talk until it’s time for her to go. We hug for a long time. Nat is resilient. Either way, I’m glad she’s seeing Ryn’s therapist. Ezy bought the house next door, we’re going to give it to her on her birthday.

The other interesting thing that happened a month after we arrived here was having a strange man come up to me. I’d stared at him, confused, when he called out my name and smiled with genuine relief.

He’d introduced himself as James Montauk, and I realised at once that this was my mother’s second husband.

We’d sat and had coffee while he’d told me about her life and how he’d helped her get sober, and they’d fallen in love. He said that just before she died, she’d revealed her life with me. James said that one day she was working on one of the other islands, she met a man that she serviced. I had winced at his use of the word, but he continued regardless. The man had fucked her and then revealed he wanted to know where I was. My mother had been beaten up quite severely, but she didn’t want to compromise my safety. She left.

I’d stared at him, stunned. My entire world twisting in and out of focus.

“No, her stuff was gone. The money. No, she left me.”

“It wasn’t her, Aspyn. Your mother had nothing when I found her. She ran, and he followed. I don’t think he ever realised you were still back there.”

I’d stared at him, feeling all these pieces fill back together. My mother was protecting me. I was not abandoned. I wasn’t a burden.

James then told me all the stories my mother told me. He showed my photographs and handed me a letter. He’d taken her name in honor of her and was so proud to be able to fulfill her last wish.

After our goodbyes and promises to keep in touch, I’d opened the envelope to find out that my mother had loved me very much. She thought about me all the time and hoped I was doing well. She was sorry. Very, very sorry about the horrible things she said and for failing me. She hoped I was okay. She prayed I would find happiness, and she regrets she let her dependency on alcohol tarnish our relationship.

My mother was sorry.

I cried for days over that. I had to reconcile the truth with the false beliefs I had in my mind. I’m not a burden.

All of that left me feeling lighter and happier. So, it shouldn’t have come as a surprise when I started stealing clothes and materials that were left around the house.

What did come as a surprise was the location. It was our bedroom, a huge airy room with a massive bed and bifold doors that opened up to reveal the most amazing view of our private beach.

It’s our paradise and, apparently, here, I don’t need a cave, and I don’t need to hide. It’s such a relief to be able to build a nest I’m proud of and looking forward to having a heat in.

I pick up the blanket and fuss with the corners before letting it fall and fluffing up a pillow.

Shale leans on the door frame and watches in hunger. “Do you know the first time I saw your cave, I almost dragged you out? I should have, but I thought it would be the worst thing I could have done.”

“It would have been the worst move.” I turn to watch him while I spread my fingers out on the material, smoothing out the wrinkles.

“I hated that for you. More than anything else, I hated that you thought you deserved to spend your heats in a cave. So, I can’t tell you how happy this makes me. So happy.”

I turn and gesture for him to join me.

“It means you’ve healed, Aspyn. It means that you’re ready to open your heart again.”

I look up and see the shimmer of tears in Shale’s eyes. Right from day one, he has protected me, looked after me, done everything he can to make me happy.

Shale, Keagan, and Beau never stopped fighting for me. Kelly gave up everything for me, while Gael never stopped looking for me. Ezy fell in love with me just from my words.

Each one of these alphas has been dedicated to me long before I was ready.

Today, I’m building a nest. No, not a nest, my nest. My forever nest.

For my heat. With my pack. In a place that is home.

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