Page 93 of Beautiful Scars

He's quiet for a long moment. "Do you remember that first day? Under the tree?"

"It's hard to forget being called a fish." The memory brings an unexpected smile to my lips.

"Yeah." He moves closer, slow and careful, like I'm a wild thing that might bolt. "I was such an ass to you that day. But God, Sunny, you were so beautiful. Even crying. So beautiful, I couldn't think straight. I have a lot of memories of you like that."

"Me too," I admit reluctantly. "Can I ask you something?"

"Hm? Sure." His face breaks into a gentle smile and he reaches out and places his hand softly over mine.

"I've always wondered why you decided to step in that day. I know I said at that time I didn't care, but I did. I was just so afraid of what your answer would be. We never really talked about it," I whisper.

"Truth?"

I nod at him. "Please."

"Okay, so I don't know how to tell you this without it sounding creepy."

Levi laughs at the concerned look I get on my face. "No, no. It's nothing bad. I just—"

He lets out a big sigh and drops his eyes to our hands. "It took me almost three weeks to work up the nerve to talk to you. On the day we moved in, I walked out onto my balcony, and saw you. You were sitting under that damn tree, your nose in a book, twirling a strand of hair around your finger and... it made my heart stop. You were just so perfect. Lost in your own little world, completely unaware and unbothered by anything.

I watched you read for hours that day. Kept making excuses to go out on that balcony every single day hoping to catch you outside again. But every time I tried to go down and talk to you, the words wouldn't come." His voice breaks slightly.

"Sunny, there was no decision for me to make. Not after I saw your shoulder. Not after I heard the things he said to you. About you. I couldn't have walked away and pretended I didn't see. Didn't care."

We sit in silence, letting the memory fill up the space between us. I slide my other hand on top of his.

"Levi, if this is going to work, I need you to tell me about that night. I need to hear it from you. Maybe it will help me understand."

He's quiet for a long moment before he starts tracing tiny circles over my knuckles. I can feel the tension building in him.

"I had this great idea on how to get even with Zack. On making sure he couldn't hurt you anymore." he finally says, his voice rough. "It was such a stupid, petty thing. I ignored your calls because I was riding the high of finally putting him in his place. I didn't want you to see that side of me. When I got home..." He swallows hard. "When I found my mom, everything kind of stopped for me. And then I found you, and in that moment I swear the biggest and best part of me died."

His free hand comes up to cup my cheek, and this time I don't flinch. "I was positive that you were gone. That I'd lost you both. I couldn't... I couldn't handle it. So, I ran. Got in my truck and starting driving to the only place I thought I had left."

"Your dad?" I ask quietly.

Levi nods. "He cleaned it all up. Made everything go away. I never even talked to the cops." His thumb brushes my cheekbone. "I believed him when he said I couldn't go back. That it looked so bad for me—taking off the way I did, what I’d said on the 911 call about it being my fault. I didn't know you were alive. God, Sunny, if I'd known..."

"But you didn't," I finish for him, believing the words for the first time, realizing how awful it all had to have been for him. "You really didn't know."

He nods, and I can see the guilt still gnawing away at him. But there's something freeing about finally having it all laid bare between us.

"Can we start here?" I ask. "I don't think we can go back and undo anything, but maybe we can start building from here?"

"Yeah," he breathes. "I'd like that."

We stay like that for a long time, sharing space and silence, Levi's hand covering mine, our fingers entwined. It's not forgiveness, not yet. But it's a beginning. And maybe, for tonight, that's enough.

Chapter Forty-Two

Levi

IfindZinhis office, hunched over his desk where blueprints of Sirens and security plans are spread out like a paper maze. The familiar smell of coffee and gun oil hangs in the air. The lighting in here makes the dark circles under his eyes more obvious. He pulled an all-nighter planning this thing.

"Everything set?" I drop into the chair across from his desk, trying to ignore the tension that's been building between us for days.

Z doesn’t bother looking up from his papers. "Almost. Since Eddie and Jake can get into the club without raising any suspicions, they’re there already getting things prepped. Wolf's team will be scattered throughout, as customers." He slides a paper across to me. "These are your positions. You'll need to stay visible, make it obvious you're with Sunny."

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