Page 116 of Lessons in Heartbreak

Bruiser came into the room, nudging my arms with his nose and emitting a low, distressed whine. I sank onto the floor and wrapped my arms around him, pressing my nose into the sleek fur of his neck, tears coating my face while I told myself over and over that this would pass. It would pass. It would pass.

After a few minutes, the grip on my lungs eased, and I sucked in a deep breath. Bruiser whined again, licking my face.

“I’m okay, buddy.” I scratched behind his ears and kept breathing until my head cleared and my hands stopped tingling. After a few more minutes, when I felt like my legs could hold me, I stood from the floor and went to splash cold water on my face. My makeup was ruined, and I couldn’t find it in me to care. All I wanted to do was crawl under the covers and sleep until the next day. Or stare at those pictures and remind myself why being alone was so much easier.

Griffin’s face tore through that thought, and I swallowed a sob.

It will pass.

It will pass.

Whatever I was feeling for him, it would pass.

With a hand still on my chest, I let the steady thump of my heart ground me as I sent Lauren a text. Then Griffin. Jaw tight with resolve, I silenced my phone, peeled back the blankets on my bed, toed my shoes off before climbing in, and tugged the covers up over my head.

Griffin

“Quit looking at the sidelines, asshole. You gonna play or not?”

Liam smacked me on the back of my helmet when I wasn’t listening inside the huddle, and I set my jaw, trying to focus on the play we were lining up.

“Sorry,” I told him. “Just ... looking for someone.”

He eyed me, the rest of the defense watching our interaction carefully. “Need to sit this one out?”

I raised my chin. “No.”

“Good.” He leaned in. “All right, we’re moving to the Miami 4-3, got it? I need you, you, and you,” he said, pointing to me last. “Crash the left side of that line. Don’t let the tight end get past you.”

We stuck our hands in, and when Liam called, we clapped once before we jogged into position. The atmosphere of training camp always felt a bit like a party, especially on days like this, where the practice fields were filled with spectators with signs, family members dressed in the team colors. Balloons danced in the air, and music played over the speaker system. Media mingled along the sidelines, and even with the massive influx of faces, I couldn’t find the one I was looking for.

I exhaled, anchoring my hand on the grass, grinning at the way Marcus growled at me from his tight-end position.

“Good luck trying to catch me, dick,” he said.

I laughed.

The center snapped the ball into the QB’s hands, and our left side pushed in hard against the O-line. Marcus tried to run a post route but bounced off my chest, and I shoved him back, where he tripped over his own run protection. I spun around an offensive lineman, hands reaching for our quarterback, who danced back and tucked the ball under his arm just before I wrapped my arms around him. In a real game, against a real opponent, his ass would be on the ground, but flooring my own quarterback was generally frowned upon.

“Damn it,” he laughed. “You’re too quick, King.”

I tapped his helmet. “That’s the point, isn’t it?”

He tossed the ball back to one of the coaches and whistled for the offense to take a water break.

Liam approached, holding his fist out for a tap. “Nice work. You do that every game, and we’ll be just fine.”

“Thanks.” Someone handed me a bottle of Gatorade, and I took a long drink, eyes skating over the different groups of people. But there was no sign of messy blond hair and big gray eyes anywhere to be seen.

“Looking for your girl that’s not your girl?”

I sighed, tossing the Gatorade bottle back to the boy who’d handed it to me. “Yeah.”

“She’s friends with Marcus’s ...” He paused. “Whatever the fuck he’s calling her. Heard him say something about consensual monogamous sex and cuddling partner, and I kinda wanted to gouge my eyes out.”

“Yeah, Lauren is her friend.” My brow furrowed. “Why?”

“Isn’t that her?” He nodded over to the opposite sideline, and I caught a glimpse of Lauren laughing at something Marcus was saying to her.

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