I felt my eyes pooling. I didn’t want to cry again, especially not in front of Weston.
“I don’t want to talk about it,” I stated, trying to keep myself from breaking. I dropped my head to take deep breaths.
Weston lifted my head with his finger. He was inches from my face. “We don’t have to talk about it. Just let me be there for you in other ways. Come on, let’s go.”
He reached for my hand, and I hesitantly placed it in his. He then walked me to the car, opened the door, and helped me into the seat.
“Let me lock up the house. I’ll be right back.”
I watched as Weston ran back up to the house and did as he said. It only took him a minute before he was back inside the car. He reached into the back, pulled out a bouquet of flowers, and placed them on my lap. My throat tightened. As much as I wanted to object, nothing came out. I knew if I had opened my mouth to speak, I would start sobbing.
“Before you protest or say I didn’t have to, I did. When Rae told me what happened and how you were, I felt as if I needed to make you feel better, even if it was only for a few seconds.” He paused. “Look at me, Taja.”
I hesitated for a second before looking at him.
“This is not your fault. He fucked up! He lost one of the best things that could have happened to him. You remember that. Any man would be lucky to have you, Taja. You are one of a kind, and I mean that shit.”
Tears were flowing, and I had no intention of stopping them.
Weston reached for my hand and placed a soft kiss on it. “I got you, Taja. Just like you had me, I got you.”
* * *
We pulledup to his condo thirty minutes later. A small chill shot up my spine as I remembered the night we spent here six months ago. He pulled the car into the garage and was soon helping me out of the car. We walked in silence as we headed up to his place. Once Weston unlocked the door, the scent of his place filled my nose, sending a nostalgic feeling through my body. The further we walked into the condo, the more images of us from that night continued to pop up in my head. I looked toward the balcony and couldn’t believe that I thought that was going to be the last time I saw that view just six months ago. Now, here we are. Same view, but different circumstances.
“You can have my room,” Weston offered, snapping me from my thoughts.
I shook my head. “No, it’s already enough that you are letting me stay. I couldn’t possibly put you out of your bed.”
“My bed is a California king bed. The guest room bed is a queen. After the day you had, you need as much comfort as you can get. I’m not taking no for an answer. It’s already been decided,” he asserted in a stern tone.
I didn’t even bother to argue. “Can you show me to the bedroom, please?”
Weston smiled. “Follow me.”
We walked down a short hall and came up to a room with double doors. Weston opened the door, and I instantly drooled. The bed was just what he said it was. It had white sheets and a big white duvet comforter. The pillows were white and brown and matched the white and brown furniture around the room. He had black and white photos of random black people that sat under warm lights. I didn’t expect his room to be so airy and peaceful. I was expecting a bedroom that was dark with no character or color like the rest of his condo.
“I love your room.”
“Thank you. It’s the one thing I have control over. It’s my serenity. I don’t let anyone behind these double doors, so consider yourself lucky.” He winked at me.
“Thank you. I appreciate it.”
“The bathroom is behind that door. Use whatever is in there. There is extra soap, bubble bath, loofahs, washcloths, and towels.” He looked around the room before looking back at me. “Hungry?”
I shook my head.
“You need to eat, Taja.”
“I’m okay. I honestly just want to take a bath and get in bed.”
“I understand that. Well, if you need me, just holla.”
Weston walked out of the room, closing the door behind him. I made my way to the bathroom and almost burst from how beautiful it was. He had a walk-in shower and a standalone tub. I searched through the cabinet and found the lavender bubble bath. I ran the water, filling the tub up just enough to not overflow but enough to cover my body. I slid my body down, allowing the hot water to sting it. Usually, I would’ve let it cool off to avoid the painful heat, yet this time, I needed to feel something besides sadness.
Instead of relaxing and taking advantage of the bath, I bawled my eyes out. The hurt of knowing that you did everything for a person just for them to turn around and do what they did, hurt so much.
I stayed in the tub ’til it turned cold. Finally, removing myself from the water, I looked in the mirror. My eyes were red and swollen. I’d never experienced being cheated on, but it wasn’t something I would wish on my worst enemy. There was nothing Jay could do to make me forgive him. I knew if I were to take him back, I would never live a happy life. The majority of my relationship would be me questioning what he was doing and whether I was still enough. Cheating was a deal-breaker for me.