Page 13 of The Family Man

I don my pink fit and flare knitted dress, paired with my favorite pearl and diamond earrings. I go to my closet and take out a box that holds an expensive pair of stilettos. As I slip them on and spritz on some perfume, I take a last look at myself in the mirror. My hair is parted in the middle and drops in waves down my back. Simple makeup, cute dress, the pastor’s wife better hold on to her man tight. I smirk. I am not a homewrecker.

It's about to be a great day. “Today is going to be a great day. Nothing is coming my way. My path is straight, beautiful and peaceful. No one can take it away from me.” I repeat my mantra out loud.

I hear a car horn blow, Rosemary is here.

I walk down my stairs and close my front door. Much to my surprise the back window of Rosemary’s Camry rolls down only to reveal the wide smiles of Cassia and Anise.

“Rosie thought we weren’t coming, but we are here,” Cassia shouts.

“After the night I had, I need the lord to forgive my sins,” Anise replies and both she and Cassia break out laughing.

I laugh with them as I walk down the stairs. I knew I was in trouble, when I felt my shoes sink into something slippery and warm. Whatever it is, it’s seeping over the sides of my shoes. I couldn’t control the laws of physics around me. This whole equation of me standing up was off. My shoes skid forward, and I fall. My dress rides up, and I feel the warm mush texture gliding up my thigh to my butt as I skid.

My hand waves around like a balloon man at a car dealership.

“Oh no!” I gape at Rosemary as she runs to my side.

“Help me up.” I extend my hand up to her. Cassia and Anise come out of the car and run toward me.

“I am not touching your hand. Are you hurt?” Anise asks, as her face forms a grimace.

Oh God, what was that smell? Smell? I look down at my hands, my nails, my knuckles are covered in a brown substance. My hands begin to tremble, my brain begins to register the texture of the substance.

“Tell me this is mud!” I close my eyes, feeling the “could be mud” mushing on my thigh.

My sisters remain silent. I open my eyes studying my new shoes which are covered in my “could be mud.” I push my hair out of my face, now the mud is in my hair.

I bring “mud” to my nose. From its smell, it’s like rotting meat. Oh no, I hope this is not…

“It’s dog poop, Sagey,” Cassia whispers. My brain knew what it was, but I am sitting, marinating in it, hoping that it’s mud.

I shake my head no. “I’m gonna kill him!” I whisper. He is the only person on the street whose dog comes into my yard.

“We should clean you up. You can’t kill him.” Cassia stands behind me and lifts me from under my arm.

“Who does she want to kill?” Rosey asks as she backs away, giving me room.

“Don’t get it on you Cassia. You can’t kill him,” Anise says as she steps back. “Who has a dog around here? That load is huge.”

“I don’t care, I’m going to kill him.” I take my shoes off. My toes are encrusted in brown dog poop. My red nail polish peeps through the poop.

I am dying. My arms are spread to my side.

I refuse to touch myself. I stare at the side of the stiletto of my shoe. My once-black shoes are now a disgusting shade of brown. I paid a ton of money for these. Now this shit is covered in shit.

“Okay, let’s go to the back and get the hose and rinse you off,” Rosemary says as she waves me forward.

“Whose dog did that? It’s all in your hair. God you stink,” Anise said as she squeezes her nose.

“If she says it’s him. It must be Pleasure Crotch next door,” Cassia replies.

I make an about turn and walk toward my tulips. He was buying me back my shoes and he was coming to clean that shit up in my dam walk-way.

“Oh my God, get her,” Rosemary says behind me.

“No! I am not touching her,” Anise says.

I cross over my tulips, my one shoe is sinking down into the lawn, I am walking like a pirate with a limp.

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