Page 19 of The Family Man

He is right of course but I still take a bottle out.

“I don’t know how to do this, D.” My heart is racing. I can feel sweat beading on my forehead.

“With patience and love. Bro, you got this,” Daire says.

“But I honestly don’t. It’s overwhelming, and I have no idea where to start with this parenting shit.”

Daire continues to stare at my TV.

“I wish I never got her pregnant. Then I wouldn’t be going through this now.”

Daire stands up slowly and approaches me. “I should slap you in your face for saying that.”

I press my cold beer bottle against my forehead. I didn’t mean it, but I can feel myself panicking.

* * *

POPPY

I sit on the top stairs listening to Zac and Uncle Daire talk. I wish Uncle Daire was my daddy. He is so nice, plus he gives us cookies and ice cream. He makes me and Nicky happy. Mishka is big but she likes us.

I knew that Zac didn’t want to be our daddy. I wish Granny and Aunty Camella kept us, but they didn’t want us either.

Nobody wants us. Maybe I can go back home and ask Granny Mildred to keep us. We won’t cause any trouble. Mommy taught me and Nikhil a lot. We can count to 100. We can use the potty for ourselves. We both know our ABCs. Mommy called us her “bright stars.”

I want to go home. I am so sad. Nikhil is sleeping, I can’t sleep.

Now I know Zac doesn’t want us, I wonder who will. I just want my mommy back. I want things to go back the way they were. Why did she have to die and leave us? I crawl back to Nikhil’s bed. I will protect us. I promised mommy I would.

SAGE

“Hold your knees to your chest. Exhale and release your legs. Come into a sitting pose. Namaste.” Cassia is a part time yoga instructor at a women's gym in the lower part of town.

I hear a breath released harshly behind me. “How is she so flexible? I can’t do this.” Anise lies back on her yoga mat.

I sit up and take my rag and wipe my mat off, and I roll it up.

“Why do you even come? You can be like Rosey and stay home.” I look at her and she is still being extra and laying on the mat.

She sits up and leans in closer. “I am here for a yoga guy.”

I shake my head. “You are incorrigible.”

Anise’s hair is in a top bun, her body is pretty. She has small everything. All cute and neat. Not like me, hips here, breast there, butt, butt everywhere.

“Yoga guys will be like ‘ohm’ and I will be like ‘bitch warrior pose me and blow my back out,’” she whispers behind her hand and giggles.

I snicker. “You need help, you know that, right?” I place my yoga mat in the carrying bag and throw it over my shoulder and stand.

“I do. But so do you. At least I date. When was the last time you went out with a real man and not B.O.B.” She wraps her mat up and stands up.

“If you must know, I have a date tomorrow.” I squint my eyes and wait for her to react.

“Oh, that’s grea—OH GOD WITH WHO?” Anise screams and begins to jog on one spot.

“SHHH, stop with the noise.” I walk up to Cassia. I know Anise is trailing behind me.

“Namaste,” Cassia says, bowing her head to people as they leave her class.

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