Page 56 of Bad At Love

“You make it easy to say the right thing. You are-”

Whatever he meant to say misted away as someone came to stand behind them and cleared their throat.

Chaaru looked up to find Kaasi staring down at them from his great height, arms folded at his chest. She jerked up, out of habit more than anything else. Her head bumped DP’s chin and a hiss of pain fell from his lips.

Walking around, Kaasi kneeled in front of DP, mumbling a string of apologies. With one hand on DP’s knee, he clasped the older man’s cheek and lifted it gently. Her heart flamed in her chest, melting away any remnant shards of ice as Chaaru watched her son’s gentle concern and sheer affection for the man at her side.

His eyes full of tears, DP said, “I’m fine. She just knocked me hard.”

“Nothing new then,” Kaasi said, including Chaaru in his gaze.

DP coughed, his cheeks turning red. Having embarrassed DP, her son wriggled his brows and turned his knowing gaze in her direction.

Chaaru fidgeted, for once not knowing what to say to him.

“Took you two long enough,” Kaasi pronounced, a smug slant to his mouth. Planting his elbows on DP’s knees, he propped his chin on his laced hands. “You’ve no idea how long I’ve been wanting to fight TJ over who gets your collection of old comics. Now you can make it official by adding me to your will.”

Chaaru stilled while DP sank his fingers into Kaasi’s hair and tugged it roughly. Her twenty-one-year-oldson made a sound like a bull, or was it a dog, and tried to get DP to dislodge his fingers by digging his head into the man’s stomach. The scuffle continued on and on, tightening her already frazzled nerves.

She’d all but forgotten about Kaasi, caught up as she had been in DP. In all these years, she’d never let him come face to face with a lover. Now, she’d broken all the rules and with a man Kaasi adored.

“We’re not getting married,” Chaaru announced, more to shut their antics down than meaning it with any conviction.

DP straightened Kaasi’s collar and patted his cheek.

Kaasi turned to Chaaru, took in her expression. Then he shot to his feet. “Sorry, didn’t mean to shove my enormous foot into my mouth. I was just… so happy to see you two together, finally.”

“We’re together,” Chaaru said, grabbing DP’s hand. By the tension in his frame, she knew that she’d made a misstep again. Damn her and her impulsive, fear-laden mouth. “Just not how you…” her face flamed as Kaasi stared at their hands together, “Just not in the traditional sense or in ways you’re used to, maybe. Actually, we don’t know what we will be beyond this week. Are you…will you be okay with that?”

Leaning down, Kaasi pressed a kiss to her cheek, and the scent of him comforted her. “As long as DP will admit that he loves me more than TJ.”

DP laughed, but there was a hollowness to it. “You and I are always going to be friends, Kaasi. You know that, right?”

“Absolutely, my man,” Kaasi said, doing some weird male bonding ritual with DP that involved hands and knees and chests. Then he kissed her cheek again, whispered, ‘let’s keep him, mom,’ and sauntered off to join his friends.

Was it that simple, Chaaru wondered. All she needed to do was to decide to keep DP and he would be hers?

What about their finances? Their homes? Living together in any form or fashion required compromise from both partners. Was she ready to give up her hard-won freedom? Was there a middle ground? Could she and DP maintain separate households, separate lives and still build something meaningful together?

No,her inner voice answered instantly. Theycouldn’t. And it wasn’t what she wanted with him. She wanted more. She wanted…everything. She wanted the everyday mundane moments and the dreamy romance, all with him.

Her mind raced as things she hadn’t considered in years came at her like little flies surrounding an overripe fruit.

“Breathe, Char,” DP said, tapping the back of her tightly clasped hands.

“Can we go somewhere private? Lunch isn’t for another hour,” she whispered, knowing that she couldn’t postpone this anymore. When he didn’t budge, she frowned. “We have to talk at some point.”

“Do we?” He sounded dead serious.

“What…” her mouth turned Sahara-dry. “What do you mean?”

“We don’t need some kind of after-action review, Char,” he said, running his fingers over her knuckles. “Kaasi’s a big boy. No, a grown man, in fact. Don’t let his comments push you into something you’re not ready to consider, much less talk about.”

“That’s not…I mean, yes, he shone a bright light on the elephant we’ve been skirting all week, but it’s not like it hasn’t been on my mind.” Her voice shook but she continued. “I’ve been counting down days, hours, even minutes with dread. You can’t really think things haven’t changed for me in the last week.”

Lifting her hand, DP brought it to his mouth. The gentle press filled her with a restlessness that edged toward dread. How was he so calm when she was flitting from thought to thought like a leaf blown by the wind?

“This week with you…” a rueful grin split his mouth, “I thought I knew what it would be like. I imagined it enough times.” His brown eyes held hers, a wealth of affection in them. “But reality beat out every fantasy. Like out of this world, this plane, this realm itself.” His throat bobbed up and down as he swallowed whatever else came to his lips. “So, if I’m reeling from it this much, I can’t imagine how you must be feeling.”

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