Page 109 of From Air

I press my hand to his cheek, and he leans into my touch. “Too late,” I whisper. “Whether you choose to love me or not, whether I’m with you or find someone else who wants my heart, if I’m alive when you leave this earth, I will grieve you. Your smile. Your laughter. Your touch.” I sniffle through my stuffy broken nose with shaky breath. “But I won’t regret anything. This love is worth the pain.”

Fitz bows his head, resting his cheek on my leg, and I stroke his hair.

“Your patient is your uncle?” he asks in a soft tone, once again leaving my heart unacknowledged and bleeding out.

“I don’t know. But he shook me the other day when he told me about his sister. Everything he said described my mom. A scar on her face. A childhood stutter. And her name. His sister’s name was my mom’s middle name. Same eye color. Too many things to be a coincidence. Melissa’s going to do some research. Maybe it’s something. Maybe it’s nothing.”

Fitz blinks with a faraway expression.

“What?”

He shakes his head. “I think about my sister too. And how she didn’t want to go, but I didn’t want her to stay. I wanted my grandparents to take me to an arcade, and if she had stayed, we would have gone to a movie of her choosing instead. So she went with my parents, and my grandparents took me to the arcade. They died. All three of them just ... gone.”

My knuckles brush his cheek, and he closes his eyes briefly before lifting his head. “You should rest.”

“Thank you for telling me that.” I control my response. I have a million follow-up questions that I hold captive on my tongue. Go where? Died how? Who else knows?

“Don’t thank me.” He fluffs my pillow and straightens my bedding. “It’s really fucking depressing, and nobody should have to hear about something so tragic.”

I don’t have a response, so I lie down and take a nap, where dreams can shape reality into something different. I hope it’s something better.

Chapter Thirty-Four

CALVIN

I spend the night with my grandma and let Melissa stay with Jamie.

The next morning, I wake to the fruity aroma of light roast coffee.

“Quick trip?” Grandma asks, pouring me a cup.

“My flight’s in four hours.” I sip the coffee. “Yeah, quick trip. I wanted to make sure she’s okay.”

“Because my boy’s in love.” She grins behind her mug.

“Because I’m her—”

“Calvin, so help me; if you lie, I will wash your mouth out with soap.”

I shake my head with a chuckle. “I tried not to love her.”

“You failed.” She eyes me much like my mother did—all knowing. A not-so-subtle gloat.

“Miserably.”

She holds up her crooked finger. “It’s time.” Bending forward, she grabs the table’s edge and stands, making her way into the bedroom. A few minutes later, she returns. “I found this a while back. I think it was your mother’s. She must not have been wearing it that day, or perhaps the hospital returned it to the family. I don’t remember.”

I stare at my mom’s diamond wedding ring on the table before me. The hospital didn’t return it. There’s no way she was wearing it. “Grandma—”

“She’d want you to give it to the woman you’ll marry.”

After she eases back into her chair, I reach across the table and rest my hand on hers. “I’m not getting married.” I could continue to feed her lies, but I don’t want her saying anything to Jamie. There’s no need to break both of their hearts with my truth.

“Well, maybe not today. But perhaps someday.”

I pick up the ring, holding it between my thumb and index fingers. “I think I love her too much to marry her.”

She scoffs. “Nonsense. What could you possibly mean by that?”

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