“Because you should discuss how it will make you feel when Maren returns to work.”
“What do you mean?” She narrows her eyes.
“Maren’s a pilot. When she’s better, she’ll get back in a plane and fight fires because that’s her job.”
Lola rolls her eyes. “No, she won’t.”
I brush her hair away from her face. “Why do you think that?” I know the answer, and that’s why I need her to discuss it with Victoria.
“Because she almost died in a plane. Why would she do it again?”
I keep my hand on the side of her head. “Because people with risky jobs know that their job doesn’t end just because something goes wrong.”
“I’m going to talk to her.”
I shake my head. “Maren is not your mom. We care about her—”
“We love her.” Lola lifts her chin.
I sigh. “We love her but can’t tell her what to do with her life. Ineedyou to understand this. The whole reason you’re in therapy is because fearing something to the point that it disrupts your life is no way to live. If Maren were scared to get back in a plane, she’d probably see a therapist too. And she may see one before she flies again just to ensure she’s ready to be in the air once more. But that’s her life. Not ours.”
Lola’s frown deepens. “Doyouwant her to fly again?”
This girl keeps me in check—too much. She’s the living, breathing definition of accountability.
Cheyenne once said Lola is an indigo child with high intelligence, intuition, and empathy that can heal humanity.
I need to believe that she’s right.
“No. The selfish part of me wants to hold her in my arms and never let her leave the ground again. But I’m a grown-up, and I must love her how she deserves to be loved.”
“How does she deserve to be loved?”
I smile. “Like I want nothing more than to watch her soar.”
“Like a bird?”
I nod.
Lola twists her lips, and lines of concentration etch her forehead. “When I’m a grown-up, I won’t be as scared.”
I kiss her head and stand. “You will be; you’ll just learn to let love burn through those thick clouds of fear.”
She grins. “And every day will be sunny.”
I chuckle, shaking my head. “You’re so smart. Too smart, just like your mom was.”
I take my own advice on love and sneak out after everyone’s in bed.
When I get to Maren’s house, all the lights are off. So I retrieve the ladder (my ladder) from her garage and position it beneath Maren’s bedroom on the second floor. And I do this with six dandelions held between my teeth.
A dim light shines when I get to the top of the ladder. I think it’s the TV, but I can’t tell, because the blinds are closed.
Sliding my phone from my pocket, I carefully type a text without dropping it.
Ozzy: Are you asleep?
Maren: I’m watching Jimmy Fallon